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Song Parodies -> "(You Picked a Bad Time for Nuking) Jung-un"

Original Song Title:

"Lucille"

Original Performer:

Kenny Rogers

Parody Song Title:

"(You Picked a Bad Time for Nuking) Jung-un"

Parody Written by:

Chris Wolvie

The Lyrics

Just over ten years ago, when North Korea became a nuclear nation, I wrote this parody, warning Kim Jung-il to knock it off. Ten years later, his son has only furthered his dad's aspirations and, recently, he tested a missile which could leave Seoul in a mushroom cloud...and says he's working on something to reach the U.S. Now, it's no secret that the President has wondered why we can't use our OWN rotting stockpile of WMDs. I mean, everyone ELSE knows why but...well, anyway. Mr. Kim, this could very well be your (and, in a sense, the entire world's) last warning. Share and Enjoy!
In a palace in Pyongyang, rising from the "Flat Land"
On a big throne sits one little man
His world aspirations brings fear to his nation
He acts this way because he can
He thinks it would be nifty, goin' back to the 50s
When the whole peninsula was theirs
He may not have a soul, but he's been eyein' Seoul
And so he builds nukes, telling others, "Beware!"

The country he rules o'er is living in darkness
No, really; no power at all
He'd rather use atoms to overcompensate
For him and his daddy bein' small
No one can talk to him; not even that Rodman
To get him to stop wanting his way
And here in the U.S., we look out to the west
Across the Pacific to say:

You picked a bad time for nuking, Jung-un
We now have a POTUS who thinks this as a boon
You might abuse 'em, but our guy might use 'em
To end all the dissin' we're doin'
You picked a bad time for nuking, Jung-un

Trump says, "We have 'em so why can't we use 'em
To defend my made-great country?
I won't let Jung-un nuke us...well, unless it's a blue state
The ones who did not vote for me."
Kim may be crazy but he's kind of lazy
Fight us now? Has he lost his mind?!
Some night, late PM, all of our ICBMs
Could light him up time after time

You picked a bad time for nuking, Jung-un
With four hundred megatons, it makes Donald swoon
We've had some bad times, (but) you'll have some "rad" times
You might bring the Earth to its ruin
You picked a bad time for nuking, Jung-un

You picked a bad time for nuking, Jung-un
We now have a POTUS who thinks this as a boon
You might abuse 'em, but our guy might use 'em
To end all the dissin' we're doin'
You picked a bad time for nuking, Jung-un
By the way, if any of the Capitol Steps are reading this, I can let you use my parodies for a cheap price. Get SOME people to laugh at them...'cause goodness knows hardly anyone HERE does...

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Pacing: 4.4
How Funny: 4.4
Overall Rating: 4.4

Total Votes: 7

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User Comments

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Rob Arndt - February 15, 2017 - Report this comment
I wouldn't worry that much as N Korea is 2-3 years away from this tech IF they perfect both the missile and re-entry vehicle carrying the nuke. Tests so far have in years yielded one successful KN-08 launch and one successful submarine-launched KN-11 launch. The third stage KN-14 is in development. Besides, their nuke arsenal is overestimated. They don't have two dozen nukes. More like half that, maybe 13. If they keep production up they may have 20-25 by 2020. Whenever Kim Jong Un says 100, think 10 or less. They could go for IRBMs, but tricky and national prestige would be down. KJU 's rep is on the line. His KN-14 is his triumph able to hit the US. He won't be letting it go. Btw, we don't even need tactical nukes to kill him or his programs. Precision B-2 strikes with JDAMs,... Carpet bombing by B-52 and B-1 with dumb iron bombs... LGM, PGM strikes with F/A-18s, MOAB or Daisy Cutter drops by C-130s... many options.
Patrick - February 15, 2017 - Report this comment
Best option would be for some general or close advisor to take him out with a handgun. Next best would be for the CIA to do it. Even one nuclear bomb would change the world in so many ways, none of them good. Trump needs to quietly rescind that old executive order prohibiting the assassination of foreign leaders. The first people to benefit would be the North Koreans.
Jonathan - February 15, 2017 - Report this comment
you da bomb! 5s
Check this out - February 15, 2017 - Report this comment
https://youtu.be/aWveazPiuxg

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