Please Take Out My Awkward Son
he is almost 21
but if he dares grab your breasts
knock him to the floor

he's a little loud with his mastication
but since each night he turns to masturbation
take the poor boy out to dinner
there's no price too high
maybe the two of you can catch a movie
boost his self-esteem and tell him he's groovy
radical wicked awesome or fly
whatever kids say

Please Take Out My Awkward Son
go ahead and have some fun
though not too much fun I'll bet
get him out my door

masquerading as a boy with a sore throat
he needs out in the world and on the love boat
maybe he likes men and not women
well surely for reasons I don't know
how can he say no to you in that short dress?
just bat your eyes and I'm certain he'll say yes
I said of course that if you date him
you will really make my day!

Please Take Out My Awkward Son
I'll have peace when he is gone
put my worried mind to rest
get him out my door (GO!)

Oh My God! my poor son did surrender
got it on! with someone other gender
gettin' freaky in her bedroom
couldn't wait for an "I Do!"

now I've got a playa son
awkward knowing what he's done
that girl ripping off her dress
I can't watch (I can't watch) NO MOOOOORE!

NO MOOOOORE!