Hairy on my wayward bro
That's as long as it will grow
Follicles are on the floor
Don't you shave no more

Once my hair grew down to my shoulders
I couldn't see my schoolbooks or my folders
Hair was flowing all over, but it grew too long
Then I looked a lot like cousin It
My mother nearly threw a fit
She said, "You're getting your head shaved."
Then I heard my brother say,

"Hairy on my wayward bro,
'cause that's as long as it will grow.
Follicles are on the floor,
Don't you shave no more."

After obtaining a wig from a store
I didn't look so very good no more
And when I visited Chicago, no
My wig flew off and blew away

On an endless road of rocky gravel
It was a very hard path to travel
I tried to grab my rug but missed it
And a passerby exclaimed,

"Hair is gone, you poor young guy.
Very far did that wig fly.
Here's a prize for getting there..
You can have my hair."

(Hair was gone...)
I got some hair from his rump
(Now it's on...)
Now I look a lot like Donald Trump
Now my head's no longer empty,
No more balding jokes for me

Hairy on, now my song's done
Hope this was a funny one
This song really is my best
Now I'll try to make up some more...