You and I must make a pact,
We must think before we act
And ignore Wayne
LaPierre (LaPierre...)

His folks fear a mythic coup,
Want to arm the teachers too
I curse his name, LaPierre
(LaPierre...)

CHORUS
He’ll just come discomfort you,
Bring his world of fears around you,
Don’t you know that he’s bound to
He’ll be there with a gun that's strong
If you have the strength, just say move along -
(And he will, yes he will)

Buy yourself a weapon if you have-ta
If home protection or the hunt your afta
But just ignore LaPierre (LaPierre…)
Guns are there to protect you, but don’t fear that we might inspect you
It’s not a game, LaPierre

(Chorus)

If you should read Amendment Number Two
I’m sure you know that it’s as clear as stew
Hey, do you hear me,
LaPierre (LaPierre...)

He don’t know, baby, yeah yeah
LaPierre, LaPierre, I curse his name, LaPierre
(LaPierre...)

(Just keep in its holster, honey - ooh)

LaPierre, LaPierre, where there is fear, LaPierre

He don’t know, baby, yeah yeah
LaPierre, LaPierre, just curse his name, LaPierre