My cat arrived home just the other day
When I asked where he was he didn't say
He only gave me a stare in that feline way
Before he hit me up for my take home pay
Now he's heading for my liquor cabinet you see
For some more Jack Daniels Whiskey
Welcome to the World of Lodgy

And my cat is unstable and it's getting scary
He's out every night partying with Prince Harry
When you going stop Perkins
And stop this jive, I'm worried if you'll survive
And use up all your nine lives

He was so precious as a kitten
When I adopted him here in Great Britain
But as he got older he got smitten
With the fast life of fat cats from Big Ben
Now he's hitting all the clubs in the back alleys
And every night I do worry
He's out instead of home with me

And my cat is unstable and it's getting scary
He's out every night partying with Prince Harry
When you going stop Perkins
And stop this jive, I'm worried if you'll survive
And use up all your nine lives

Well, one day I couldn't take it and sat him down
And told him what I thought bout him running around
"Your starting to embarrass me in my home town.
I getting letters from neighbors and even the Crown."
He turned to me and said ,"It's not my fault you see.
You're the one feeding me cans of Friskies."

And my cat is unstable and it's getting scary
He's out every night partying with Prince Harry
When you going stop Perkins
And stop this jive, I'm worried if you'll survive
And use up all your nine lives

Well one day when I came home from my work
Perkins was waiting for me with his little smirk
He was all curled up with some crumpets and tea
Reading the London Sun as he spoke to me
"Seems my scandals of partying around the clock
The Queen found out about me and Harry, bollocks
Thank you Mr. Rupert Murdoch."

And as he put down the paper he then turned to me
So much for Prince Harry
How about you and me..... Lodgy

And my cat is unstable but it's alright you see
Instead of partying with Harry, he's partying with me
Now my life's set, I'm no longer upset
And Perkins is the purrrfect pet
And Perkins is the purrrfect pet