There are worse things I could do
than eat a chocolate bar or two
Even though the neighbourhood
thinks my waistline is no good
I suppose it could be true
but there are worse things I could do

I could praise all homemade pies
sniff and watch them as they rise
compliment hardworking cooks
comment on their tasty looks
then refuse to eat the meal
that's just not part of the deal

I could exercise all night
wait around for the scales to be right
Take herbal remedies every day
and throw my life away
on a dream that won't come true

I could hurt someone obese
with sanctimonious talk of inner peace
I don't drink and I don't smoke
but I still like to please my bloke
A fact I'll bet you never knew
but to munch in front of you
that's the worst thing I could do