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Song Parodies -> "Captain Morgan's Revenge"

Original Song Title:

"Closer To Home"

Original Performer:

Grand Funk Railroad

Parody Song Title:

"Captain Morgan's Revenge"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

Many people, including me, think the title of this song is "I'm Your Captain." That title would make more sense to me, but I didn't write the song. I wrote this one:
Oh not now please, don't do to me
'Cause my throat is, quite thick
Drank some Captain, name of Morgan
Now I'm feeling kind of sick

I have tossed back, drinks uncounted
And I don't know, where I've roamed
Have a beer please, and take care please
Don't give me too much foam

If you can help me, off this bar stool
I will bless your mother's birth
Lift me up now, 'fore I hack chow
And stop this, spinning earth

Oh great now I'm really heaving
Feels like my guts are leaving
Watch you don't slip on my debris
You better step around it
Too late you just now found it
Oh please don't take it out on me
Sorry, yeah.....

I can hear the band, playing louder
And it's frightening, with every note
Bass is sounding, head is pounding
Stop their playing, grab my coat

No more Captain, hate that Morgan
No no I'm feeling deathly sick
Trouble walking, listing to side
And she spurns me, my chick

No more Captain, no, no, no, no
Find the bathroom, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
No more Captain, no, no, no, no
Find the bathroom, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'm getting closer to the throne
I'm such a hoser, night is blown
Feel like a poser as I moan
I need a dose or two at home
Ohhhh ...

[Repeat until literally sick]

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   10

User Comments

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McKludge - February 04, 2010 - Report this comment
Never did like Captain Morgan myself, but this does remind me of a few Tequila nights.
Timmy1k - February 04, 2010 - Report this comment
I'll drink to this one.
MadameDeRum - February 04, 2010 - Report this comment
I do love the "ad" of the Captain . . . he's a jolly right Pirate for sure, Sir ! . . . chips aHoy !
2Eagle - February 04, 2010 - Report this comment
Dis aint my toilet - I can't sleep here tonight.
Phil Nelson - February 04, 2010 - Report this comment
Reminds me of some boozy nights too, with red wine. Oh well anyway, really funny stuff, 5's
Fiddlegirl - February 04, 2010 - Report this comment
Oh Captain, My Captain!!! :D
Tommy Turtle - February 05, 2010 - Report this comment
I have no idea what the title of OS is, 'cuz DK it.... Enjoy your penance kneeling at the Porcelain Altar, saying 555 "Ail, Merries".
blackjack21 - February 07, 2010 - Report this comment
More belated thanks to McKludge, Timmy1k, MadameDeRum, 2Eagle, Phil Nelson, Fiddlegirl and Tommy Turtle! I hadn't recovered enough from my hangover to comment until today. ;-)

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