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Song Parodies -> "Wreck of M.S. Wilhelm Gustloff"

Original Song Title:

"Wreck of Edmund Fitzgerald"

Original Performer:

Gordon Lightfoot

Parody Song Title:

"Wreck of M.S. Wilhelm Gustloff"

Parody Written by:

Susanna Viljanen

The Lyrics

Airfarcewon gave me a good idea. Here is the commemoration of the greatest maritime disaster of all - M.S. Wilhelm Gustloff, torpedoed January 30, 1945. While flying the Nazi flag, her passengers were refugees - mainly women and children. She was one of the unfortunate victims of the juggernaut of war.
The legend lives on of the ship that went down
On the grey sea they call with name Baltic
She was the largest her kind, but the mills of war grind
And her fate was by no means exotic

With a load of refugees, nine thousand, maybe
Mostly wives, mothers and sons and daughters
Wilhelm Gustloff that day at the Gdynia Bay
Was boardrded and heading for safe waters

She had heavy overload, ten thousand on board
For a vessel length two hundred eight meter
But at desperate time overload was no crime
And her captain then hoisted Blue Peter

The Soviet onslaught would leave, yup, spared nought
All women would be raped and homes looted
When the gangways were raised, still places were chased
But they were repulsed and off-booted

The convoy was led, as the survivors said,
by a torpedo boat named Löw-eh -
Then Gustloff would go, with Hansa to follow
They were escorted by Admiral Hipper

But alas - a week before had left the Hanko port
A Soviet submarine named S-13
She was eager for a kill, and commander full of will
Aleksandr Marinesko was captain

The ambush was set so S-13 would get
a good bearing on largest target
Thee torpedoes were shot, and they swam at forty knot
No one had noticed the lurker beneath yet

First of tin fish hit her bow, and then on a row
came second which hit her on midships
The third of torpedoes, hit her room of dynamos
The lights went out as did the electrics

The pumps went all out and panic spred about
It was clear that the proud ship was all gone then
The women onboard screamed as the seas roared
"Who would rescue our babies and children?"

The January seas of the Baltic often please
coastal Poland with mildish mid-winter -
But it was freezing that day, minus eighteen, they say
And the waves would the rescue work hinder

The panic ensued as everyone knew
there would not be enough boats and life jacket
Many were already drowned at the full-cramped bow
when the first tin fish hit it and crack it

People did jump to sea, which was not a good idea
As the cold water would cause hypothermy -
Radio wired out to air "Please come now, be fair -
We're sinking" - Aye, SOS, confirm-y!

Soon the rescuers arrived and they all together strived
To save as many people they would manage
One thousand and two hundred were rescued soon
But eight thousand did perish in that carnage

We know Titanic, indeed and Lusitania, maybe
And Edmund Fitzgerald is iconic -
But Gustloff, which was lost, of eight thousand souls' cost
Who'd remember that lost ship of Baltic?

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 5

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User Comments

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AFW - December 29, 2008 - Report this comment
I had not heard of this tragedy untill your comment...Very good job of telling the tale, here
Susanna Viljanen - December 29, 2008 - Report this comment
AFW, the Gustloff tragedy is well known amongst the Baltic nations, but little known elsewhere. It occurred during the wartime, it occurred to the losing side, and there were no celebrities nor public figures on board - just wounded soldiers, evacuees and refugees. And to add infamy to the incident, Captain Marinesko was not a poster boy Soviet soldier - he was ill-disciplined, highly individualistic and insanely brave. He had enemies within NKVD, who arranged him in troubles - he was dishonourably discharged after the war, and sent to Gulag. Yet several survivors of the Gustloff sinking are still alive, some of which were yet babies at the time of sinking.
Patrick - May 14, 2014 - Report this comment
After reading your tales of the Lusitania and the Argo Merchant, I had to come back and discover this tragedy which I had overlooked. Trapped between a rapacious Soviet army and the freezing waters of the Baltic, is a nightmare that exceeds any bogus "horror" film. Maybe some day someone will give this story the Titanic treatment.

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