The legend lives on, here in our lovely town,
Of the noodles, and subsequent madness.
Caused by one better known for his stuffed tiger
‘Twas a boy who was known for his badness.

It started one day, in an innocent way,
When this boy asked to go to the bathroom.
He would not be taught, an adventure he sought,
And his mischievous prank it did mushroom.

To a room he snuck, and it was our bad luck,
He found an order requesting noodles,
the princ’pal had made, and then he had mislaid;
and that boy wrote on it and made doodles.

Seems noodles chow mein, many kids did disdain,
But Mr. Spittle found them quite pleasing.
So noodles sought he, from a new company,
Missed the doodles, ‘cause he mailed while sneezing.

Now this noodle firm, they did call to confirm,
Said they weren’t sure it was his handwriting.
He said “okay” too, thought it said just a few.
Never dreaming what he was inviting.

One by one trucks came, more and more of the same,
Noodles leaving the staff nowhere to sit.
Though noone had proof, Miss Wormwood hit the roof
Said “That Calvin has to be behind it.”

The principal called, he said he was appalled,
But o’er the phone, they would not have quibbles.
The staff tried to work, but their minds went berserk,
Like Klingons in “The Trouble With Tribbles.”

Shipments ceased next day, police kept them away,
by then the school was flooded with noodles;
A scribe got this quote, “Rather crash my speedboat,
While being mauled by hordes of wild poodles.”

Well beyond our state, ads told of parties great,
They begeed millions to come party heavy.
Staff had to act fast, for they feared ballots cast,
‘twould be doomsday till their next tax levy.

Visitors got sick, of those noodle so quick,
Sales of chow mein had a crash stupendous.
With pork or in cheese, those noodles could not please,
And in ice cream they were just horrendous.

At our great shindig, people ate like a pig,
As that boy spoke of aliens freaky.
And somehow that child, claimed his tiger ran wild,
And made a great mess of the bar tiki.

The principal scarfed, on the mayor he barfed,
As he looked in vain a bowl to borrow.
Still all said, “Come on, let us party till dawn,”
Like it was some Mardi Gras Bizzaro.

The school raised enough, the cost was not too rough,
Somehow noone wound up losing their jobs.
‘Twas raised buying all stock in Pepto Bismol
It was needed thanks to Calvin and Hobbes.

He’s in college now, and has blogged about how
He once caused the school in noodles to swim.
Townspeople wait some, till back home he will come,
And with water balloons we’ll all pelt him.

Underneath our land, rests a time capsule grand,
Where the noodles lead to stories spooky.
But the staff all fears, that in eighty-plus years,
They’ll open it and think we’re all kooky.

But, for now we’ve sighed, said “At least no one died,
Except for the third grade’s hamster named George.”
The school bell it chimes, ringing ninety-five times,
For the many noodles their pet did gorge.

The legend lives on, here in our lovely town,
Of the noodles, and subsequent madness.
Caused by one better known for his stuffed tiger
‘Twas a boy who was known for his badness.