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Song Parodies -> "The Dead End of the Martian Mines"

Original Song Title:

"All In A Mouse's Night"

Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"The Dead End of the Martian Mines"

Parody Written by:

Scotty Dangerously

The Lyrics

This is my 5th Total Recall parody of a song from “Wind & Wuthering.” This is about when Douglas and Melina are stuck behind a wall of the Martian mines and how they try to figure out how to get past that wall. This song parody takes place after Douglas and Melina escape from Rekall in the Mars colony. This is sung by some characters, Douglas, Melina, & Benny. By the way, it has been a long time since I wrote the previous TR song parodies. I have been trying to resume writing this entire TR album parody as soon as I could. I hope to have this album finished off this year.

I can’t see what lies beyond this wall
But at least, we have escaped from a place called Rekall
I know there’s a Martian artifact
Which can change the red sky and that’s really a fact


But how do we blow up this wall
If we have no dynamite at all?
Maybe we wait for something
I know you killed your so-called wife
But at least, I have saved your life
From Richter’s gang


When I held the small creature’s hands, I opened my mind
And noticed this sphere that lies behind
This one treasure is beyond this wall
I’ll touch it, before those bad guys make me fall

But I believe something’s after us
Maybe a machine that’s as big as a town bus


We are not just gonna stand around
Before our dead bodies fall straight to this ground
Sooner or later, this big wall must blow
Before we get killed by Cohaagen and foes


This wall will not end our chance to escape
We must make it, before it is too late
To touch the hand sphere
We are in this mine, and there is no time to dine
But I hope this world of Mars will turn out fine
Way beyond here

Now we hear a drilling machine coming after us
It’s grinding down some much Martian rocks and dust
Our asses may be stuck right at this dead end
But we will take a stand to put this to an end

And now this machine’s in for the kill,
Who is inside that doom machine that’s got drills?

Benny the Martian Taxi Driver:

It’s me, Benny, I am driving this machine
I’m gonna kill both of you, I’ll kill y’all off nice and clean

I’ll get you suckers, I’ll have you dead
Our friendship is at an end, I’ll bust your heads

And now I ask you once tonight,
who’s gonna win this deadly fight?


You are one ugly motherf**ker
You’re a bad mutant man, you’re a killer
My ice bomb will freeze you
And blow you right up

(Douglas sticks the icy bomb on the front of the machine and freezes it. As Douglas and Melina sneak several feet past the machine, Douglas says “Hasta la vista, baby,” to Benny and blows up the machine with the detonator. Finally, the wall Doug and Melina have been stuck on has been reduced to gravel, leaving them on their path to the Martian hand sphere.)
Five TR song parodies down, three more to complete the album. The sixth song parody of the album will be a parody of "Blood on the Rooftops." The seventh song parody of the album will be a combined parody of two instrumentals, "Unquiet Slumber For The Sleepers" and "In That Quiet Earth." And the eighth and final song parody will be a parody of "Afterglow." By the way, "You are one ugly motherf**ker" is a line from Predator (1987) and "Hasta la vista, baby" is a line from Terminator 2.

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Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 2

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    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 4   0
 5   2

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