As sung by Attorney General John Ashcroft:

(instrumental intro)

You must be nice to W.
We're watching the things you say and do.
If you're not nice to Bush each day.
You're gonna piss me off every way.
Because I've got the notion
Those who cause commotion are a**holes.

Bush's monarchy... is rollin' like a wheel.
If you don't wanna serve a lifetime...
You'd better shape up, boys and girls.
And if you call me names...
I'll prepare a room, where they'll be reamin'
All of the slime who don't like W.

You must be nice to W.
We're watching the things you say and do.
If you're not nice to Bush each day.
You're gonna piss me off every way.
Because I've got the notion
Those who cause commotion are a**holes.

(instrumental break)

Gonna clamp things down...
My cops will pick you up, if you plead and carry on...
'Cause little things mean a plot.
I don't need no orders to spy on...
I'll just increase the pain... and cleanse away your brain.
For those who have a lot to say.

You must be nice to W.
We're watching the things you say and do.
If you're not nice to Bush each day.
You're gonna piss me off every way.
Because I've got the notion
Those who cause commotion are a**holes.

You must be nice to W.
We're watching the things you say and do.
If you're not nice to Bush each day.
You're gonna piss me off every way.
Because I've got the notion
Those who cause commotion are a**holes.

(repeat refrain and fade)