My mother says that it's true
She can't believe you're a Jew
She knows a goyum is such
Don't want to kibbutz too much
And now the time has arrived
To see if you're circumsized
My mother says that it's true
She can't believe you're a Jew

Pardon the way that I doubt
Come sabbath you're always out
And her suspicion's complete
When we see ham's what you eat
But if your faith, it is real
Then you will have kosher meals
My mother says that it's true
She can't believe you're a Jew

She's saying oy vey
Because it's just not right
She knows there's no way
He's out on Friday night
Another oy vey
Next we'll find out he's gay
I'm hearing oy vey
Then she gets down to pray
It's always oy vey
Guess you should go away
Because you're no Jew, baby, no you're no Jew