Bill Gannon reads the suspect his rights
and then he will un-cuff him
then offers him a smoke and a light
and then will ask some questions

Sergeant Friday gets headlines
he always captures all the ink
Here he is in on Channel Eleven
Man, that sure does stink

Bill always drives the squad car
"Cause Friday's such a big deal
he has to find those places to park
his hands; always on the wheel

Could just once Joe Friday say
"Hey, Bill, it's my turn now to drive"
Always acts like he's been sent from heaven
Gracious Sakes alive
Don't believe that guy

(Bill Gannon)
(Bill Gannon)
(Bill Gannon)
(Bill Gannon)

Bill's wife made some fresh pie tonight
at home she brings him a slice
and then complains that, "it's just not right"
and says some things that aren't nice

"Bill, your partner, he's a jerk
he's taking credit for your busts
There he is now on Channel Eleven"
gestures in disgust
{Expletive!!}, she cussed


(Bill Gannon)
(Bill Gannon)
(Bill Gannon)

Think she's right
Friday sure does bite
every night
hogging the spotlight
I'm uptight
Tell him "take a hike"

{Instrumental to Fade}

{added lyrics here}

(Ooh, take a hike)
(Joe, go take a hike)
(Take a hike)
(and then go fly a kite)
(I'm uptight)
(he hogs the spotlight)
(Wife is right)
(Friday needs a wife)
(Tell that guy)
("Hey, Joe take a hike")


(Joe's a swine)
(ass-cheek kissing kind)
(Tell that guy)
("You, I do not like")

~ ~ ~ the end ~ ~ ~