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Song Parodies -> "Telephone Line"

Original Song Title:

"Telephone Line"

Original Performer:

Electric Light Orchestra

Parody Song Title:

"Telephone Line"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

You know that horror movie cliché where the killer calls the victim on the phone before he/she kills them, just to freak them out when he/she could've easily offed them by not letting them know someone's trying to kill them? Yeah, let's make that funnier than it already is.
[Dial tone…]

Verse 1: Hello, how are you?
You alone tonight?
Turn off those pesky, pesky, pesky, pesky, pesky lights
Now I must say, you’ll be such easy prey
Can find you with that telephone
Yeah yeah yeah…
Hey! Am I scary?
You will feel my blade
Don’t you realize that you are dead? You’re dead
I’m somewhere here, not upstairs, nope not over there
Can’t see me but I see you…
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Chorus: Doo-wop dripping-bloody drops
No cops, no way!
Ghost face, black eyes
Find you, you’re slain!
Yes you can run and hide
The help you need ain’t gonna be here soon
Already inside
This little game we’ve played will be your doom
On the telephone line
That’s where I shine, send shivers down your spine
On the telephone line
I’ll make you mine, it’s my scary device

[She hangs up… dials again… no answer]

Verse 2: Okay…
So no one’s answering
Well, I’ll just let it ring a little longer, longer, longer, oh…
I’ll just sit tight
In shadows, prepare to fight
But can’t act ‘til the line’s restored…
Oh no no no
Yeah yeah yeah!

Chorus: Pick up! Pick the thingy up!
You do, you’re dead!
Pale face, red knives
Why won’t you call back?!
My plan has been denied
The creepy phone call was to set a tone
Why won’t she just die?
I cannot kill her ‘til she’s on the phone!
On the telephone line
Answer this time! I can’t hide here all night
On the telephone line
This is a crime, this closet is too tight
On the telephone line
I’m out of time, I’m hear the cops bright lights
Off the telephone, I’m doing time…

[Fade out]
Please rate and comment! And if you liked this parody, get on the telephone line and become a fan! You can follow me at Facebook or Twitter, where you can get all your Blaydeman news and updates the instant their posted! P.S. There is no call in number for these webpages. That was just a clever tie-in to the song you just read to be funny. There are no phones and no one manning them. It's strictly an online process.

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.4
How Funny: 4.2
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 8

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   1
 3   1
 4   0
 5   6

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Agrimorfee - October 07, 2014 - Report this comment
(Artistry) Hehe, well done, nice idea incorporated into the OS idea. I wish the song had a third verse so you could pile on the frustration for the killer.
Jonathan - October 07, 2014 - Report this comment
can I assume I'm not the only one ready for halloween? 5's
Matthias - October 09, 2014 - Report this comment
This parody made me SCREAM with laughter! Ghostface would be proud! And great ending and plot hole in that famous scene from that great movie.
bobpiecheese - October 21, 2014 - Report this comment
(Artistry) I agree with Agri in that you could've taken the idea a little bit further, but the nature of the OS works against you. Still, I'm a sucker for taking the original title and doing something completely different with it, and this was a great example of that. 555 dead lines...literally!
Abbott Skelding - October 21, 2014 - Report this comment
I actually don't think you needed more OS to push this idea to the max. I think it ended just fine and was still really funny. Normally, a contrast in topic and original song style kinda throws me, but for some reason the dark lyrics and sweet "do-woppy" chorus was a really funny combination. Nice work!
Max Power - October 21, 2014 - Report this comment
Dial 555 for an alibi.

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