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Song Parodies -> "I Am The 1-1-1 'Guy' (Gal)"

Original Song Title:

"American Pie"

Original Performer:

Don Mclean

Parody Song Title:

"I Am The 1-1-1 'Guy' (Gal)"

Parody Written by:

Ones Guy (Shelly)

The Lyrics

This is my answer to the parodies and comments about me and the others. There's more than one of us, but you can get revenge on me, since the others are probably too embarrassed to admit who they are.
The 'Tong Song' bited so
I was forced to register my disapproval with a set of ones
Yeah, that's the song that finished me
From giving unearned fives, fours, threes --
Even lowly twos, I found, were overdone
The way the author bitched (so bitter!)
It seems she never did consider
Maybe my low rating
Meant her poor work I'm hating
It's not that I aspired to be
A bitch who gives out 'four less three'
But all to often parodies
Are lame, and weak, and tired

And so I'm sayin
I, I am the 1-1-1 'guy'
If the song is live, it gets a five -- yes even from me
But if it sucks, of course the reality
Is it's gonna get 1-1-1 from me
Gonna get 1-1-1 from me...

Some like to belittle me
Saying "she can't write a parody..."
Cause it makes them feel so good
As if only those who have the skill
Should have the right to boost or kill
And to speak their minds by voting as they should
So here's a chance to feel much better!
Here's your chance to come and get her!
Give your lowest ratings
To she whom you are hating!
And if you start to feel aroused
When you use the 'power of the mouse'
Maybe no more you will grouse
About the "damned ones guy!".

And so I'm sayin
I, I am the 1-1-1 'guy'
Yes, this song is lame, so give me flames to show your appalled
Or really tick me off and don't vote at all
And feel better when you've lashed out, and why?
You've put down the 1-1-1 'guy'!

Tell her, shell her, give her holy hell -- her
Parody is poorly done:
Got no sense of pace and rhyme
And the way it flows is clunky too,
Like a pair of Ugg-ly shoes
And the choice of song is much less than sublime
But how can you expect of me
An even "so-so" parody:
My parody role models
have been your silly twaddle!
You want something to make you laugh?
Then read a parody from Spaff
And don't read this on my behalf --
I'm just the dumb ones 'guy'!

And so I'm sayin
I, I am the 1-1-1 'guy'
Yes, this song is lame, so give me flames to show your appalled
Or really tick me off and don't vote at all
And feel better when you've lashed out, and why?
You've put down the 1-1-1 'guy'!
Give it to me! Do you feel better now? Good. Now write better parodies, silly fools, and don't pick on me because everybody else lies to you and tells you your 1-1-1s are 5-5-5s!

Your Vote & Comment Counts

The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.0
How Funny: 3.8
Overall Rating: 3.9

Total Votes: 21

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   3
 2   1
 3   1
 4   5
 5   11

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Jeff Reuben - January 11, 2005 - Report this comment
I'm not sure whether to give you 5s or 1s, but this was pretty funny
B. Robinson - January 11, 2005 - Report this comment
You go, girl! This was not bad! I've never understood why people bitch and moan about you and your pals. This was about a 4-3-4, but I'm giving you a 5-5-5 just to tick you off!
John the gruntq - January 11, 2005 - Report this comment
Wish granted. 1-1-1
Claude Prez - January 11, 2005 - Report this comment
This is great.
2nz - January 11, 2005 - Report this comment
Yeah, I hope there's a 'part 2' coming. This was really funny. By the way, thanks for putting me in my place all those times and reminding me it wasn't about the ratings. I owe you one(s).
Sweet Indigo - January 11, 2005 - Report this comment
My problem with you and all the other one-guys (btw, stop shattering our illusion that it's just one embittered guy trying to screw it up for everyone else, you're ruining our fun! :) ) is the tendency to vote 111 and then not leave comments. If I've got enough courage to write a parody expressing my opinions or beliefs and someone dislikes it but only votes 111 with no comment, I generally assume that they are a cretin, and are merely proving I have the intellectual high ground. It's also a sign of idiocy since the 'pacing' vote is fairly objective and generally a 1 is unjustified. If you don't like a song, by all means vote low, but speak up and tell them why you're voting so low.
BTW, the parody is very well written, good job.
Tim Mayfield - January 11, 2005 - Report this comment
Well done, one's 'guy'! 5's! I thought if comments were left by the 1's voters, I may understand the error of my ways, but alas, the comments they do leave (on mine and other parodies) are clueless and void, so I am at a loss still.
Phil Alexander - January 11, 2005 - Report this comment
I keep wanting to sing the chorus bit to Chesney Hawk's "I am the one and only"... so, are you *really* the (or "a") 1-guy, or is that just a nom de plume?
Shelly - January 11, 2005 - Report this comment
Hey guys, thanks for taking this so well! Maybe I'll write another parody sometime!
Robert J. Pagliaro - January 11, 2005 - Report this comment
This was good.
Will - January 11, 2005 - Report this comment
As the all-time recipient of 1-1-1 votes (literally thousands), your parody is a 5-5-5. Nice job!
Steven Cavanagh - January 11, 2005 - Report this comment
I thought this was great.
Michael McVey - January 11, 2005 - Report this comment
And so we finally hear from The Amiright Onester (hint, hint).... -- MM
Michael McVey - January 11, 2005 - Report this comment
And BTW, I agree with Sweet Indigo: if you dislike a parody that much, then the author could use some constructive criticism, not just silence. Tell us what we did wrong so we can improve and write better parodies! -- MM
Ricky Ticky Taffy - January 11, 2005 - Report this comment
I'm going to vote 5/5/5 on this. Why vote ones? The pacing was good.
John Jenkins - January 11, 2005 - Report this comment
Your argument that there is vote inflation at amiright and some of us voters award 5s to average parodies too frequently is probably a valid one. I commend you for a lot of good lines in this parody, but your parody only has 3 verses compared to 6 for the OS; and, by omitting the other 3 verses, you miss a lot of opportunities for clever plays on words. But, factoring in the degree of difficulty of the OS, I conclude that you earn 4-5-4.

Also, I found your use of the word "bited" to be very clever and well-fitted for the opening line, but please clean up the rest of your spelling on your next parody.
Kristof Robertson - January 12, 2005 - Report this comment
Well, here's my two cents worth...this gets a 444 in my book; the pacing wasn't perfect, but it was pretty funny and reasonably well written.....see, that was called giving constructive feedback! My problem with the 1s-ers (like so many others) is twofold: 1) Not giving feedback; if you really don't want to be flamed, use a nom de plume, but please give reasons...and 2) There are three categories, and pacing is one of them: you may hate the content or the humour, so by all means rate it low if you want...but if it's well constructed and fits in with the original, pleeeease recognise that and vote fairly! 'Nuff said...
Shelly - January 12, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks guys! - January 12, 2005 - Report this comment
Mighty well written. I have my suspicions as to who "Shelly" is, but I ain't sayin'. For the record, IT'S NOT ME, though if it were, that would explain the shout-out to Spaff. (Thanx for that, by the way.)

Here's my take on 111's: One of the main reasons we submit parodies to this site is to get feedback from random Netizens. Some of those Netizens are gonna like our stuff, some aren't. Those who don't like it aren't going to bother being objective about pacing; they're simply gonna give the lowest score possible.

Why would they do such a terrible horrible thing? Well, maybe they don't like the subject matter. Maybe they don't like one of the jokes. Maybe it's a parody of their favorite song or band or decade. Maybe they spilled their coffee in their lap and are experiencing extreme genital pain. Whatever. It's feedback. Enjoy it.

And remember that all good satire pisses someone off.
Stuart McArthur - January 13, 2005 - Report this comment
yep, making parodic enemies is a badge of honour - wear 1s with pride - if you never get ones it just means you haven't upset anyone, which means you probably haven't amused anyone either

(I too think I know Shelly - and she's the 3 Cs - cool, clever, and confrontational)
Shelly - January 13, 2005 - Report this comment
Hey Spaff! Your my idol! Thank you for leaving a comment! But I don't think you know me. Or you either, Stuart. But I am cool :)
Michael Pacholek - January 15, 2005 - Report this comment
Since you've confessed, every song you ever post here will get ones from me. In case you haven't noticed, there's a war on! And there will be no taking of prisoners! Besides, you earned these ones: Even Madonna did this song better!
Ingeborg S. Nordén - January 16, 2005 - Report this comment
The real problem I see with most triple-1 votes is that the voter *does* leave them uncommented...and that triple-1'ing a decently paced song just because someone dislikes the new topic, the original artist, or some other aspect of a song is dishonest. There's a reason that no "Message", "Topic", or similar category exists to vote on; that kind of criticism belongs in the comment section, not in the ratings. Granted, the "Humor" and "Overall" categories are mostly a matter of opinion; but "Pacing" shouldn't get a 1 unless someone has NO sense of the original song's rhythm. As for what I think of your own give an honest opinion, I'd have to vote 4 in pacing (the OS is pretty difficult to match), 3 in humor, and 4 overall.

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