Scary scary guy
Specializing in foul play
Causing panic everyday
Please try to exercise some self control
But you never will
'Cause you get such an evil thrill
Setting off a fire drill
When it's a busy day at Disneyland

I don't understand
Why you think that it's alright
To swap out apple jam with Vegemite
You are as cruel as cruel can be

You're setting stink bombs off in random shops
The horror never stops

Scary scary guy
Filling water guns with ink
Peeing in the kitchen sink
And smearing toilet seats with crazy glue
Yes it seems that you
Need to cause somebody pain
You tie folks up in ball and chain
Then make 'em listen to an emo band

I don't understand
Why you have to act like that
You decapitated grumpy cat
Ok, that's really not so bad

You're working hard to get on people's nerves
It's just what they deserve

For nobody loved you
And so it made you blue
Then when no hope was left in sight
You decided you just might
Start wrecking lives, it seemed the thing to do
And look what it all has led to
You're giving Alec Baldwin
A Kim Basinger tattoo

Scary, scary guy
Driving on the Interstate
At a steady 38
Your laser pointer pointed at a jet
And you haven't finished yet
It's trouble like we've never seen
On any other Halloween
You're pouring salt into the lemonade

Now we're so afraid
We don't know where you might be
You might be placing dog poop potpourri
In every car and SUV

But now it's over, we can all be calm
Because they caught you -- mom?