A long, long time ago...
My brothers and I were known,
As the Jackson Five, we made it to the top.
And then I went and got my chance
Boy how I made those zombies dance
With The Thriller I crowned myself the King of Pop.

But facial surgery made me question
With every face I changed complexion
Could I be a white woman;
Did I have to even be human?

And then I attempted to hide
Behind a rare disease I tried,
to keep my race but not the pride.
The day The Thriller died.

So bye-bye, creepy pedo guy
Now the streets a little safer,
Children don’t have to cry.
And those poor young boys, who didn’t tell any lies,
Are singin’ “Why are people mourning this guy?”
“Why are people mourning this guy?”

What was with that rhinestone glove?
Did a kid ever teach you how to love?
And not the way we all know?
Do you think your rock ‘n roll,
and music save your mortal soul?
And can you teach me to moonwalk like a pro?

Well, we know you were in bed with him
'cause you ran your mouth; you’re mighty dim.
There’s not a lot to say,
Oh I'll never forget that day.

He was a lonely preteen broncin’ buck
And you said it’s time for me to get a closer look,
We figured you ran out of luck
The day The Thriller died.

I started singin’
bye-bye, creepy pedo guy
Now the streets a little safer,
Children don’t have to cry.
And those poor young boys, who didn’t tell any lies,
Are singin’ “Why are people mourning this guy?”
“Why are people mourning this guy?”

Now for two days you’ve been dead and gone
Do us a favor and don’t respawn,
We’ll get life to the way it used to be,
When the children point the finger of blame,
You said they were tryin’ to rob you of your fame,
People bought it, but the story still was lame.

Oh, and since you’re probably going down
Please ask Satan for this corny clown.
Why the courtroom was adjourned;
When no guilty verdict returned?
And while Al Sharpton claims you had the spark,
To bring the white man out of the dark,
We sing no dirges in the park for
The day The Thriller died.

We were singing,
bye-bye, creepy pedo guy
Now the streets a little safer,
Children don’t have to cry.
And those poor young boys, who didn’t tell any lies,
Are singin’ “Why are people mourning this guy?”
“Why are people mourning this guy?”


Outside the clinic it’s an MJ drive.
People singing your songs hoping you’ll survive,
But you’re in a coma and fading fast.
Though the LA Times said that you were past.
CNN tried to make the story last,
With the coroner ruining this media blast.

Now let’s play some clips of him when he sang.
To appease our minor guilty twang.
They all got up to dance,
But I never wanted the chance!
Cause the singer tried to raise a shield;
His lawyers all refused to yield.
Do you recall what was revealed
Before the Thriller died?

We started singing,
bye-bye, creepy pedo guy
Now the streets a little safer,
Children don’t have to cry.
And those poor young boys, who didn’t tell any lies,
Are singin’ “Why are people mourning this guy?”
“Why are people mourning this guy?”


A population’s worth in one man’s face
A question lingers about his race.
We’ll debate until our throats are sore.
So come on: Jackson please, oh, Jackson quick
Tell me was it worth it just to see his stick?
Cause liars are the devil’s only friends.

Oh, and as I watched him on the stage
My hands were clenched in fists of rage.
No angel born in hell
Could break that satan’s spell.
And as the flames climbed high into the night
To light the sacrificial rite,
I saw satan laughing with delight
The day The Thriller died

He was singing,
bye-bye, creepy pedo guy
Now the streets a little safer,
Children don’t have to cry.
And those poor young boys, who didn’t tell any lies,
Are singin’ “Why are people mourning this guy?”
“Why are people mourning this guy?”

The “girl next door” who sang the blues
Was barely mentioned on the news,
She was noted and then quickly turned away.
I rack my brain to figure why
This musical legend pedophile guy
Is worth more than those who die most every day?

And in the streets: the fans all screamed,
The loved ones cried “his debt is redeemed”
Their sorrows had awoken,
Some good hearts there were broken.
With news stories around the clock,
Taking time away from more quality stock
Of programs I am forced to mock,
The day The Thriller died.

And they were singing,
bye-bye, creepy pedo guy
Now the streets a little safer,
Children don’t have to cry.
And those poor young boys, who didn’t tell any lies,
Are singin’ “Why are people mourning this guy?”
“Why are people mourning this guy?”

They were singing,
bye-bye, creepy pedo guy
Now the streets a little safer,
Children don’t have to cry.
And those poor young boys, who didn’t tell any lies,
Are singin’ “Why are people mourning this guy?”