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Song Parodies -> "Coal in the Stockings"
Original Song Title:
"Smoke on the Water"
(MP3)Original Performer:
Deep Purple
Parody Song Title:
"Coal in the Stockings"
Parody Written by:
Chris Bodily TM
The Lyrics
This parody has been floating in my head since December began and maybe even a little before. The concept of this parody is similar to Weird Al's "The Night Santa Went Crazy" or maybe even "Bad Santa." Enjoy!
Ho ho ho
Ho ho ho ho
Ho ho ho
Ho ho
(Repeat until first verse)
We all came down to Santa's house
Told him what to put in the tree
He was really, really jolly
Last year, but not this time
Kris Kringle and the reindeer
Dropped some bombs down by our house
And I didn't get Van Halen
(When) Santa Claus came to town
Coal in the Stockings
And fire in the tree
Coal in the stockings
He went to our neighbor's house
He died from a heart attack
Santa Claus was frightening for the man
Bandit elves stole their stuff
When it all was over
He had to find another place
St. Nick came down my chimney
His teeth were rotten, convict face
Coal in the Stockings
And Kenny G CDs
Coal in the stockings
(Guitar solo)
We ended up at the Police Department
It was not Kris Kringle's beard
The cops said "Santa" was stoned and he escaped
From the San Quentin there
With a big red nose, Rudolph was a fake
And so was the Mrs.
Chief Connor told me all about this
He wasn't Santa at all
Nick went to Prison
And got executed
He is in Hell now
Ho ho ho
Ho ho ho ho
Ho ho ho
Ho ho
(Repeat/Fade out)
Ho ho ho ho
Ho ho ho
Ho ho
(Repeat until first verse)
We all came down to Santa's house
Told him what to put in the tree
He was really, really jolly
Last year, but not this time
Kris Kringle and the reindeer
Dropped some bombs down by our house
And I didn't get Van Halen
(When) Santa Claus came to town
Coal in the Stockings
And fire in the tree
Coal in the stockings
He went to our neighbor's house
He died from a heart attack
Santa Claus was frightening for the man
Bandit elves stole their stuff
When it all was over
He had to find another place
St. Nick came down my chimney
His teeth were rotten, convict face
Coal in the Stockings
And Kenny G CDs
Coal in the stockings
(Guitar solo)
We ended up at the Police Department
It was not Kris Kringle's beard
The cops said "Santa" was stoned and he escaped
From the San Quentin there
With a big red nose, Rudolph was a fake
And so was the Mrs.
Chief Connor told me all about this
He wasn't Santa at all
Nick went to Prison
And got executed
He is in Hell now
Ho ho ho
Ho ho ho ho
Ho ho ho
Ho ho
(Repeat/Fade out)
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 2 | 2 | 2 | ||||||||
| 5 | 17 | 17 | 17 |
User Comments
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Hahahahaha what a cack!!! I especially pissed myself laughing at the line "And Kenny G CDs", fantastic parody all 5s mate!!!
As a former soprano-sax-player wannabe, I laughed my octave key off at the Kenny G line.
Just the thought of the words "ho ho ho" being sung to the famous guitar riff is funny enough.
He's in the chimney
And he has stole your tree
¨ He's in the chimeny
You're getting fives from me.
And he has stole your tree
¨ He's in the chimeny
You're getting fives from me.
"...and Kenny G CDs"? Damn, what did you do to get THAT naughty? Well, this parody goes on my Nice List!
(SOTM) You get points for getting the guitar solo from the original stuck in my head. I agree with everyone above...the Kenny G line was classic! Good job, one of your better songs in my book.
(sotm) Somebody really ticked off the big guy for him to go from jolly to jaded.
Very Charlie Brown.
(SOTM) Smokin'!
Kenny G SUCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(SOTM) Not bad, but having heard Weird Al's previously sort of overshadows this one.
Kudos for parodying the riff. Just yesterday I was reading Rolling Stone's "500 Greatest Songs of All Time"; Deep Purple's keyboardist claimed that the working title for this song (#426) was "Durh Durh Durh." It was written about a fire at a Frank Zappa concert started by some idiot fan with a flare gun. Ain't trivia great?
Anyhoo, fun stuff, Oh Trademarked One. "Coal in the stockings / And Kenny G CDs" is classic.
Anyhoo, fun stuff, Oh Trademarked One. "Coal in the stockings / And Kenny G CDs" is classic.
Very enjoyable; ditto on the Kenny G line.
(SOTM) Yeah, The "Kenny G" part makes this step out front, for sure...Very fine job...5's.
Can't believe I missed this one first time around- you had me on the "Ho ho ho" bit :-)
Good one CBTM
(SOTM) Cute and clever. Hey, folks ought to pitch-in on an all-holiday set of parodies of "Smoke On The Water". We can start with CBTM's "Coal in the Stockings", and my "Scrooge Said "Bah, Humbug!"".
SOTM--nice job on this one!
cool lyric.... as a soprano sax player I liked the Kenny G line too!!
(SOTM) nice tidy story-line Chris - I liked it
What everybody else said, particularly "ho ho ho." Well done, Chris.
SOme post-holiday cheer. As an also-sax player, let me also ditto the 'Kenny G' line.
(SOTM) Memorable.
(SOTM) Ditto on the Kenny G line.
(SOTM) Yuletide meets 70s heavy rock...cool! 555
Funny idea , I can't stand that Kenny G. It should be Kenny gee he can't play worth crap.
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