Woke up with a warning buzzer in my mind
Sensed something wrong here, or my day planner's lying
Did some misarranging, 'cus two names are popped on one line

I've got two dates, Friday night, got two dates
Maybe calendar is mistaken?
Maybe then I should try to slip one by
And we all could make it...
(Conscience) : Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no , no, no...

It would be kinda sleazy making it with two
We'd get tied and greasy and we'd do lush things with food
(Conscience) : Wow! Your testost'rone chappy, has made you quite the fool...

But I've two dates, brainy, I've got two dates
Do you really think I'd forsake that? (heck no!)
Subtly I'll try to wine and dine and bide
time if they will take it
(Conscience) : Oh, HO HO!

Went and applied intent on Brie and Sue
But their busts stayed tightly tethered, and their jeans did too
They both laughed and called me sad, and both chorused "Screw you"!

I had two dates, sadly, I had two dates
That they're cruelly e-radicating (dang it!)
Twosome decides no "I" required
And they leave embracing
Oh whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa!

Mind's eye sate, plainly
Just my fate: go home and
M******


(Conscience) : "I knew it..."