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Song Parodies -> "You Drain Veins"

Original Song Title:

"You're So Vain"

Original Performer:

Carly Simon

Parody Song Title:

"You Drain Veins"

Parody Written by:

Tim Mayfield

The Lyrics

Well, it seems Alvin beat me to it (by a few years!) but oh well, here's my version anyways. Here's Alvin's
You walked into the coffin
Like you had drunk a bit too much scotch
When you repeatedly tried to touch your nose
You noticed you'd lost your watch

With the sunrise getting nearer
Can't afford to lose track of time
If you don't hide
You'll be dead come the morning
Dead come the morning

'Cause, you drain veins
You probly think their heart pumps just for you
Draining veins
If you don't want a mess here's one small clue
Don't chew
Don't chew

Well you transformed centuries ago
And joined the vampire breed
Though you used to serve to protect townfolk
These days you just make them bleed

If you gave away the place you rest
They'd kill you in your sleep
They'd drive some stakes
Then put nails in your coffin
Nails in your coffin

'Cause, you suck veins
Your frequent biter miles came when you flew
Claiming veins
If you could drink a cow what would you do?
Don't moo
Don't moo
Don't moo

(Shrilly Bat Noisy Break With Cow Sounds)

Why do they scream
When your cape blocks the camera
Cape blocks the camera

'Cause, you leave stains
You prob'ly think the maid cleans up for you
To the pain
If you could get a lawyer would you sue?
Don't sue
Not Sue

Well, I hear you suffer from paranoia
It's your curse can't stand the sun
When you bet those townfolk that they'll never poke ya
I'd say your acting's a bit over done
Now you're drinking blood instead of wine
And when it's hot your crypt
That's where you hide and your coffin won't open
Coffin won't open

'Cause, you love veins
You probably dream of blood each day you snooze
You slurp veins
Your dentist thinks your canines should kill you
But you are dead aren't you now?

You hit veins
You keep those town folk sticking to curfew
You waste veins
Your drinking bloody Mary and raw Stu

You rate veins

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 6

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   6

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

alvin - August 20, 2008 - Report this comment
excellent work...especially liked "don't chew"..."nails in my coffin" and "frequent biter miles"
John Barry - August 20, 2008 - Report this comment
Grade-A Type A.
AFW - August 20, 2008 - Report this comment
From the veins, it pours...bloody well done, Mate
Below Average Dave - August 20, 2008 - Report this comment
About two months too early, but a Vampire read is always fun . . .and this song seems SO obvious for it, brilliant.
Tim Mayfield - August 21, 2008 - Report this comment
Thanks alvin, John, AFW, and BADave. BADave, yeah, I know, but it seems a waste to post 150 parodies in a single month and then not post but 5 the other months. ;-)
Dr Music - August 21, 2008 - Report this comment
Excellent. Just excellent. It's almost Tim Burton-esque. Have you been watching Tim Burton movies lately? You should send this to Tim Burton- I think he would love to have it as a song in the upcoming Dark Shadows movie adaptation.
Meriadoc - August 22, 2008 - Report this comment
This was a delightful read!
Tim Mayfield - August 22, 2008 - Report this comment
Thanks Dr Music and Meriadoc.

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