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Song Parodies -> "(Tell Me Why) I Don't Like Volvos"
Original Song Title:
"(Tell Me Why) I Don't Like Mondays"
Original Performer:
Boomtown Rats
Parody Song Title:
"(Tell Me Why) I Don't Like Volvos"
Parody Written by:
Phil Alexander
The Lyrics
Subtitled: my trip to work today... I think this one's self-explanatory
The stupid car in front of me
Is driving way too slow
And I'm gonna be too late for work today
Maybe I should have stayed at home
And I simply do not understand it
It must be twenty-five years old
And I can see no signals
'Cause there are no signals
Get that heap of junk off of the ro-o-o-o-oad
(Tell me why) I don't like Volvos
(Tell me why) I don't like Volvos
(Tell me why) I don't like Volvos
I want to shoot
The whole make down
You don't feel knocks in a big steel box
Any damage done is slight
And I won't begin 'bout lane discipline
As he meanders swerving - left to right
How can it be that they never see
All the wreckage strewn behind their steel cocoon
And I can see no signals
'Cause he still don't signal
Some signals would be nice to be shown
(Tell me why) I don't like Volvos
(Tell me why) I don't like Volvos
(Tell me why) I don't like Volvos
I want to shoot
The whole make down
And the driver's stopped blocking all the road
And I pray that he'll soon arrive
And school's out early I hope he'll be learning
And the lesson today is HOW TO DRIVE
And then my horn is beeping
Is that driver sleeping?
I'm having trouble letting him survive
And I can see no signals
'Cause there are no signals
To tell me where he's going to dri-i-i-ive
(Tell me why) I don't like Volvos
(Tell me why) I don't like Volvos
(Tell me why) I don't like Volvos
I want to shoot
The whole make down
The stupid car in front of me
Still driving way too slow
No point taking kids to school today
Already time for going home
And I simply do not understand it
Is the driver blind and old?
And I can see no signals
'Cause he NEVER signals
Get that heap of junk off of the ro-o-o-o-oad
(Tell me why) I don't like Volvos
(Tell me why) I don't like Volvos
(Tell me why) I don't like, I don't like
I don't like Volvos
(Tell me why) I don't like Volvos
I want to shoot
The whole make down
Is driving way too slow
And I'm gonna be too late for work today
Maybe I should have stayed at home
And I simply do not understand it
It must be twenty-five years old
And I can see no signals
'Cause there are no signals
Get that heap of junk off of the ro-o-o-o-oad
(Tell me why) I don't like Volvos
(Tell me why) I don't like Volvos
(Tell me why) I don't like Volvos
I want to shoot
The whole make down
You don't feel knocks in a big steel box
Any damage done is slight
And I won't begin 'bout lane discipline
As he meanders swerving - left to right
How can it be that they never see
All the wreckage strewn behind their steel cocoon
And I can see no signals
'Cause he still don't signal
Some signals would be nice to be shown
(Tell me why) I don't like Volvos
(Tell me why) I don't like Volvos
(Tell me why) I don't like Volvos
I want to shoot
The whole make down
And the driver's stopped blocking all the road
And I pray that he'll soon arrive
And school's out early I hope he'll be learning
And the lesson today is HOW TO DRIVE
And then my horn is beeping
Is that driver sleeping?
I'm having trouble letting him survive
And I can see no signals
'Cause there are no signals
To tell me where he's going to dri-i-i-ive
(Tell me why) I don't like Volvos
(Tell me why) I don't like Volvos
(Tell me why) I don't like Volvos
I want to shoot
The whole make down
The stupid car in front of me
Still driving way too slow
No point taking kids to school today
Already time for going home
And I simply do not understand it
Is the driver blind and old?
And I can see no signals
'Cause he NEVER signals
Get that heap of junk off of the ro-o-o-o-oad
(Tell me why) I don't like Volvos
(Tell me why) I don't like Volvos
(Tell me why) I don't like, I don't like
I don't like Volvos
(Tell me why) I don't like Volvos
I want to shoot
The whole make down
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 3 | 3 | 3 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 1 | 0 | 1 | ||||||||
| 4 | 2 | 1 | 2 | ||||||||
| 5 | 8 | 9 | 8 |
User Comments
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Great stuff Phil !
Nice job and, since its based on a true story, I hope it didn't set the tone for the rest of your day.
Well, maybe I exaggerated a bit... though of course the day got better: I wrote a parody about it ;-) I've also just heard of a cocktail, called a "Sunny G" (not to be compared so Sunny D), which contains mango liqueur and galliano... another parody has sprung to mind (I'm just trying to find an mp3...)
Wouldnīt "Hundai" have been a better/funnier substitute for "Monday"?
"Hyundai" crossed my mind, but you don't get the same steel-cocooned nobody-else-matters feeling as Volvos seem to instil, so it would have been a different parody. As I say, I exaggerated a bit... but not much ;-)
Hyundai? Nah... too far fetched, even for a parody. Nobody would believe that someone actually saw a Hyundai in motion... unless the driver was pushing it, that is! ;)
Phil, I don't comment on many of your parodies, but read and vote usually very well for them.. this is awesome..I know what you're thinking of the "I own the road and I have some money so piss off" volvo drivers.. but to be truthful, I don't like Mondays and the way hyundai is pronounced (hun-day) is a point too. I gave it 5-5-5 because it deserves it either way.. just inspired me to write one now.. after this comment Supertramp "dreamer" will henceforth be "beemer" good work
Sorry ībout spelling Hyundai wrong. I see your point, though Volvo isīnt so much of an expensive car here where theyīre from, those models go mainly on export, here itīs more like the family car alternative for Joe and Jane Average. Taken their size into consideration I think I can relate anyway though. :-)
Nice work
Excellent Phil. I'm sure we've all been there. 5s from me.
Outstanding as usual; "HOW TO DRIVE" was perfect.
Thanks for the comments everyone - I thought of you this morning, Malcolm, when I was cut up by a BMW :-)
Wait, Phil...you got cut UP by a BMW? Dont go to pieces on us
What's wrong with Volvos? They are one of the best makes in the world...Take it from me i oughta know since I am a Swede and have owned 3 of them. But still a great parody.
Thor, the main thing wrong with Volvos are the people who drive them: they are a very strong car which gives the driver a feeling of complete security... there is definitely a whole class of Volvo drivers for whom the entire outside world is a minor inconvence to be overlooked as they pass slowly from a to b not noticing the chaos left in their wake from cars they simply didn't realize were on the road.
5-5-5 What IS IT about Volvo's? Personally I think it's because they're a 'LOOK AT ME - MY LIGHTS ARE ALWAYS ON' attention seeking type of hatred!
OK, can anybody suggest why the Google ads have come up with one for Wyrd Sisters (the Diskworld book)?
Hey Phil. This is a great parody. I am a Swede myself and i have to say that Volvo's are a fantastic vehicle. Dont underestimate it's power mwahahahahahah............................ great parody 5's
Hey Jan! "LOOK AT ME-MY LIGHTS ARE ALWAYS ON attention seeking type of hatred"...??? What is that supposed to mean? This is one of the weirdest AND DUMBEST comments I've ever read. Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Hehehehe, I love songs that bag out Volvos. In Australia there is a group called "The Scared Weird Little Guys" whom did a song called "Volvo Man", it's soooo funny it's worth getting a hold of, you'll find it on Kazaa. Lot of people in Australia bag the shit out of Volvos and there's even a Volvo ads on Aussie TV called "Volvo for life" which the Volvo drivers cause problems on the road and the guy driving behind the Volvo whom gets pissed off mutters "bloody Volvo driver!", one ad the lights go green and the Volvo took ages to go and the man in the car behind goes "bloody Volvo driver!". Great stuff mate!!!!!
A postscript... after another bit of Volvo-inspired trauma in my trip to work this morning, I have decided there are two different sorts of Volvo drivers out there: those who haven't realized there are any other cars on the road, and those who have, but don't care.
Very funny parody, Phil. About three or four years ago, Volvo's motto was "Volvo - We'll save your soul!" I think that about says it all.
great stuff...wish i could write parodies :(
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