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Song Parodies -> "No Place to Smoke"

Original Song Title:

"No Time to Think"

Original Performer:

Bob Dylan

Parody Song Title:

"No Place to Smoke"

Parody Written by:

Leo Keough

The Lyrics

In life, you face death with a shortness of breath
And deep thoughts of your slow suicide
Folks show you no mercy, you're cold and you curse
As they force you to take it outside

Loneliness, chilliness, impropriety, notoriety.
The passerby's groan as you stand there alone
Unknown as you slowly choke
And there's no place to smoke

In the states and the cities they've been showin' no pity
In bills they've decided to change
The laws they're enactin' haved caused you distraction
And your whole life has been rearranged

Morality, legality, bureaucracy, hypocrisy
Denied just a puff, you've been sent in a huff
To the alley where you're left to croak
And there's no place to smoke

Grudges will haunt you, the Surgeon General will taunt you
His words will get you distressed
You've seen all these warnings through a set of deep mourning
Eyes, and you feel so depressed

Habitrol, Nicotrol, hypnotism, recidivism
Nicotine rules you and destiny fools you
Like a vague and ambiguous joke
And there's no place to smoke

Your conscience betrayed you when some truant did sway you
To take up this habit of shame
You'd have staved off the taboo but still he impressed you
And that's how you fell for his game

Paradise, nasty vice, mortality, reality
But the addiction is stronger and withdrawal much longer
Than weed and even than coke
And there's no place to smoke

Pleasure to quell you is what admen sell you
They're content when you're under their thumb
Lawmen oppose them, but your taxes throw them
To survive it they play deaf and dumb

Bankruptcy, poverty, duplicity, complicity.
You glance and you're stunned at your shortage of funds
In the bank as you slowly go broke
And there's no place to smoke

Landlords' restrictions and threats of eviction
Follow rules to improve indoor air
You can't find no safe haven to indulge in your cravin'
Anytime, anyplace, anywhere.

Allergens, carcinogens, formaldehyde, infanticide
You have no solution to cleanse this pollution
That is fueling the flames that you stoke
And there's no place to smoke

You've murdered your vanity, buried your sanity
For pleasure you must now resist
Lovers upbraid you but cannot dissuade you
They're not even sure you'd be missed

Impotence, indifference, tobacco stains, withdrawal pains
Friends standing near but you turn a deaf ear
To the sounds of the truth they invoke
And there's no place to smoke

The feast that you're dining on seems to be going on
Longer than you'd rather care
With tightness of chest, you're showing unrest
Some notice but try not to stare

Loyalty, unity, hospitality, geniality
You turn around for one real last glimpse of your meal
As you grab for your pack and your cloak
And there's no place to smoke

Bullets can harm you and death can disarm you
But no, you will not be convinced
Stripped of all pride as the toxins inside
Can be treated but cannot be rinsed

No place to sit when your lungs give out
No place to quit and tough it out
No place to prepare for your final despair
No place to suffer your stroke
And no place to smoke

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 3.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 4.0

Total Votes: 1

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   1
 0
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 4   0
 0
 1
 
 5   0
 1
 0
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Andria - November 24, 2008 - Report this comment
Having no place to smoke is actually a good thing, in some ways. Cutting back on secondhand smoke that causes lung cancer, emphysema and asthma, for one. I will give you a 3 for pacing, a 5 for how funny and a 4 for overall score.

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