Song Parodies -> "Signin' Up For Healthcare"

Original Song Title:

"Takin' Care of Business"

^(MP3)

Original Performer:

"Signin' Up For Healthcare"

Parody Written by:

The Lyrics

I love the fact that this song is from Canada.

(Musical intro)

I get up every mornin'
As my wife’s still snorin'
Get online, fire up my cable modem

Drink my coffee, have a muffin,
Soon I’m on healthcare.gov and
All the forms,
I try to download ‘em

And if my state exchange
Covers scrotal nits and mange,
It’s time to get enrolled without delay

With my massive hemorrhoids
Thanks to bein' self-employed,
I have to shop for healthcare all day!
And I’ll be

Signin’ up for healthcare—
Every day!
Signin’ up for healthcare—
With co-pay!
I been signin’ up for healthcare—
It's online!
Signin’ up for healthcare—
It's workin’ half the time,
Or not!

(Instrumental interlude...website temporarily down…)

Not an easy admission,
Pre-existing conditions
Like cancer, bad farts, diabetic—

Thanks to President Obama
(He's the one who killed Osama)
Even PTSD's copacetic!

Also thanks to Mister Rom-
Ney, ObamaCare's the bomb!
It's workin' just great in Massachusetts—

And if everybody's covered
Then we might discover
Prevention of disease isn't useless!
Get busy

Signin' up for healthcare—
It's the law!
Signin' up for healthcare—
System's flawed!
We be signin' up for healthcare—
Get online!
Sign up for some healthcare—
Or pay a hefty fine!

Word's out!

(Instrumental interlude...website temporarily down again…)

Whoooooo!
All right!! Ow!

Take healthcare—it’s our business!
Everyone pays!
Every day!
Whoooo!

(Instrumental interlude…little ball spinning again…)

I'm gonna follow Boehner
'Cause I'm no complainer,
Though the website's actin' kinda shitty—

Need a doctor for my colon
And my lumbar disc is swollen
And my wife
Has lumps on her tittie!

And if my AGI
Isn't super super high,
My premium is subsidized, okay!

If I’m ever unemployed
Just remember I’ve enjoyed
The fun of shopping health plans all day!
I better

Sign up for some healthcare—
Takes all day!
Sign up for your healthcare—
Click and pray!
Got to get some freakin' healthcare—
It's a grind!
Sign up for some healthcare—
And cover your behind!

(Brief Instrumental Interlude...website undergoing further repairs…)

Signin’ up for healthcare, whoo!
Signin’ up for healthcare
Signin’ up for healthcare, yep!
Signin’ up for healthcare

Signin’ up for healthcare—
Everyone!
Signin’ up for healthcare—
So much fun!
Signin’ up for healthcare—
Jump online!
Signin’ up for healthcare—
Website’s workin' fine!
Whoooo!

Signin’ up for healthcare
Signin’ up for healthcare
We be signin’ up for healthcare
We be signin’ up for healthcare

Whoooo, signin’ up for healthcare
Signin’ up for healthcare…

(Fades out)

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User Comments

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Dr. Oliver Clozoff - December 16, 2013 - Report this comment

This was really brilliant. Scrotal nits and mange, LOL.

Callmelennie - December 16, 2013 - Report this comment

It never occurred to me before now just how difficult a song TCB is to parody. It's quite a challenge. I looked at some other parodies of this song and I can see it's a very good song to work with

Jonathan - December 16, 2013 - Report this comment

you kicked the funny into Bachma-Turner-Overdrive here! 5's

Bob Gomez - December 17, 2013 - Report this comment

Oliver: thanks, it's great to have a real doctor comment on this song. Wait...that is your real name, right? Lennie: yeah, the internal rhymes were definitely a challenge, especially for Bachman, Turner, and of course the drummer Overdrive. Thanks for the comment. Jonathan: thanks, hoping to get a video posted soon.

Callmelennie - December 17, 2013 - Report this comment

What I meant by "good song to work with" is -- if you work through the rhyming scheme, the finished product is going to be very funny. I was looking thru some of the parodies for TCB and they are mostly a scream -- particularly the ones by Alvin Rhodes. Let me tell you, anyone reading this comment -- if you want to die laughing, click on the BTO link and find "Undertakin' Business." ;-D ..... Hey, I'm serious as a heart attack, you'll bust a gut reading that one.

Dave W. - December 17, 2013 - Report this comment

Laughter is good medicine...without a prescription...555

Bob Gomez - December 17, 2013 - Report this comment

Thank you, Dave, you know you rock hard like Viagra.

Smeg And The Heads - December 20, 2013 - Report this comment

That was really good. Had some laugh out loud lines in it. Great job on a difficult song.

Dr. Gulliver Kissoff - December 23, 2013 - Report this comment

I am against Obamacare for two reasons:

1. For all its presumed reforms, it preserves the capitalist system of service for profit. It promotes "free markets," in which the contingent need for various types of medical aid can be bought for various prices -- and everything varies in accordance with supply and demand. As for the insurance companies, they are the casinos, and the casinos always win.

2. I don't understand Obamacare, and I don't even understand what I wrote in 1.

The Constitution promotes the general welfare. To me that means the highest quality health care for all, on demand, for having tithed 5.8491% of one's gross income to a Health Security Fund. I have worked this out precisely. If someone gets sick, he goes to a troika of primary care providers who decide on the course of treatment, in accordance with broad outlines proclaimed by me. They shall recommend a specialist, if necessary. The troika shall consist of one Black, one Asian, and one Jew with a very proud mother. Irish need not apply. Waste, fraud, abuse, quackery, fee-splitting, and groping shall be punished by ten years at Leavenworth, eleven years at Twelveworth, or five to ten years at Woolworth.

LadyTwerken - December 26, 2013 - Report this comment

This is a blast, Sir ! . . . but sadly it doth 'ring' real, Sir!

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