Song Parodies -> "Payin' Bills From Christmas"

Original Song Title:

"Taking Care Of Business"

^(MP3)

Original Performer:

"Payin' Bills From Christmas"

Parody Written by:

The Lyrics

It's February and this is the month that the Christmas bills usually start to show up for remittance. I bought nothing on credit this Christmas so I won't be seeing any February bills. Now for those of you that have bought on credit, hopefully you can get a tax refund if you live in the US and pay those bills off with that.

Got woken up this morning,
With a phone call warning,
Payment's late they scream at me so shitty.
It's the hassle that they love,
It's the pushin' I ain't lovin',
Pay your bill, so says my remittee.
So if you pay on time,
And you work a credit line,
I starve 'cause raving slobs want all my pay.
"Oh, yes sir, I'm still employed",
"Just my funds are all deployed",
"I just can't pay you nothin' today".
"'Cause you see"...

Payin' bills from Christmas (every day)
Payin' bills from Christmas (every way)
And I'm payin' bills from Christmas (all on time)
Payin' bills from Christmas as my payments fall behind.
No doubt.

Now I'm eatin' out at missions,
Take my meals at soup kitchens,
Eatin' out with down and out fellows.
It be suckin' man, it are,
Livin' outta my car,
Bricks I'm hittin' if this cash crunch don't mellow.
Let me be, I have no funds,
Too much buyin' now I'm done,
Bills that I'm not likely to pay.
Christmas mirth I should avoid,
As I fall self destroyed,
I love to work for nothin' all day.
Now you see

Payin' bills from Christmas (every day)
Payin' bills from Christmas (every way)
And I'm payin' bills from Christmas (all on time)
Payin' bills from Christmas as my payments fall behind.

Mercy
Whooooo
All right

---- Instrumental Interlude ----

They don't care, 'bout your Christmas,
They want their pay, by due day.
Whoooo

My credit cards I'm burning,
'Bout to dock my earnings,
I'd escaped this scene had I been thrifty.
Bought a Bissell for my rug,
And some cushions and an oven,
All my friends I bought 'spensive gifties.
And if your brain's off line,
You will spend your every dime,
So Peter does Paul rob these bills to pay.
Now I'm gettin' paranoid,
They can be such hemorroides,
I hate these jerks that call me all day.
Now you see

Payin' bills from Christmas (every day)
Payin' bills from Christmas (every way)
And I'm payin' bills from Christmas (all on time)
Payin' bills from Christmas as my payments fall behind.

---- Brief Instrumental Interlude ----

Payin' bills from Christmas, whoo
Payin' bills from Christmas
Payin' bills from Christmas
Payin' bills from Christmas
Payin' bills from Christmas (every day)
Payin' bills from Christmas (every way)
Payin' bills from Christmas (all on time)
Payin' bills from Christmas
And fallin' far behind
Whoooo
Payin' bills from Christmas
Payin' bills from Christmas
Payin' bills from Christmas
I've been Payin' bills from Christmas
I've been Payin' bills from Christmas
Payin' bills from Christmas
Payin' bills from Christmas

(Fade)

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User Comments

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Royce Miller - February 04, 2005 - Report this comment

nice one, Guy; what's a "tax refund"???

Stuart McArthur - February 04, 2005 - Report this comment

it's the one-present-for-them one-present-for-me approach that knocks me around Guy - very timely - 555

Tim Hall - February 04, 2005 - Report this comment

Instead of 18.9's, i'll give you 5s across the board!

Adagio - February 04, 2005 - Report this comment

Very good, Guy...can you say instant hit? Timely! 5's

Robert J. Pagliaro - February 04, 2005 - Report this comment

Guy, a BTO fan - I love it. Like you, I too paid cash for all the gf's xmas gifts - which means I have no money in February. Oh, the parody was very good too.

alvin rhodes - February 04, 2005 - Report this comment

perfectly paced and delicious wordplay...a textbook example of parody writing...bravo

Phil Alexander - February 04, 2005 - Report this comment

Strange to say I DKTOS, but I love the title... if I can find time, I'll see if I can find the original (I get the feeling it'll be worth it)

Leo Jay - February 04, 2005 - Report this comment

Excellent.

2Eagle - February 04, 2005 - Report this comment

You hit the nail on the head. Is Christmas really necessary?

Michael Pacholek - February 05, 2005 - Report this comment

Guy: This may be the only time I ever say this to you, so enjoy it: "Amen and fives, brother!" Royce: A "tax refund" was what we used to get when we had a President who knew what he was doing when it came to economics. Has it really been only four years? (And change.) 2Eagle: That depends on what the originator would think. After all, as a "Saturday Night Live" sketch from '86 pointed out, it was really tough to shop for Jesus, because his birthday fell so close to Hanukkah.

John Jenkins - February 06, 2005 - Report this comment

A lot of good lines, particularly the paranoid/hemorrhoids lines.

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