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Song Parodies -> "Rouge"

Original Song Title:

"The Jack"

Original Performer:

AC/DC

Parody Song Title:

"Rouge"

Parody Written by:

Dylan Baranski

The Lyrics

For our final bonus parody of "Sonic the Hedgehog Month", we take a look at a character who's been both revered and reviled for her voluptuous good looks: Rouge the Bat. Ostensibly an agent for G.U.N., treasure hunting is a big hobby for her, and she wants to grab all of the world's gems. Enjoy the parody! DKTOS?
She looked like a queen,[1]
I felt like a king,
She was smilin’, beguilin’,
And made my heart sing.

She had such a nice pair,
She could make men cry,
Her eyes were shining,
And for her I’d die.

But how was I to know that she’d had Knuckles before?
Said she’d never had a human, should’ve known for sure
From the heart shape of her breastplate to the pink tips on her boots,
She’d make a move to get her prize if I had some loot.

They call her Rouge, [x8]
They call her Rouge, Rouge, Rouge, Rouge, Rouge, Rouge, Rouge…
They call her Rouge.

[guitar solo]

Chaos Emeralds she’d claim,
Chaos Emeralds excite her,
Many robots she’d maimed
Except maybe Omega.[2]

She liked ‘em fast,
And she liked ‘em hard,
She could smash a jewel
And find every shard.

But how was I to know that she’d been Shadowed before?
Said she’d never had a manly man, should’ve known for sure
That this cheeky little mama had been workin’ as a spy.
And if I’d known who she was stealing for, I’d have stole her pie.

They call her Rouge,
They call her Rouge,
They call her Rouge, and who knows what else?
They call her Rouge, yeah yeah!
They call her Rouge,
They call her Rouge,
They call her Rouge,
They call her Rouge,
They call her Rouge, Rouge, Rouge, Rouge, Rouge, Rouge, Rouge…
They call her Rouge.

They call her Rouge,
They call her Rouge,
Woman’s such a big steal. (Rouge)
She says her name’s (Rouge), eh,
They call her (Rouge),
They call her (Rouge),
They call her (Rouge),
Ooh, can you tell they call her (Rouge)?
Rouge, Rouge, Rouge, Rouge, Rouge, Rouge, Rouge…
They call her Rouge, they call her Rouge…

They call her Rouge,
They call her Rouge,
They call her Rouge,
You might not know ‘cause they call her Rouge.
They call her Rouge,
They call her Rouge,
They call her Rouge,
They call her Rouge, she’ll bite,
They call her Rouge,
They call her Rouge, Rouge, Rouge, Rouge, Rouge, Rouge, Rouge…
They call her Rouge.
Ahh!

[crowd boos]

[spoken]:
Thank you, thank you, thank you people, thank you!
Thank you very much, we’re here ‘till Thursday!
Try the chipped beef!
Don’t forget to tip your waitress!
NOTES:

1-Not used to mean "gay person", but to mean "smokin' fine mama".
2-Refers to E-123 Omega, a robot created by Dr. Robotnik who defected and ended up working with Shadow and Rouge as part of Team Dark.

Copyright 2020 by Dylan Baranski GmbH S.p.A. Inc. Misuse is punishable by gettin' the jack.

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