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Song Parodies -> "Ones Are the Laziest Rating"

Original Song Title:


Original Performer:

Three Dog Night

Parody Song Title:

"Ones Are the Laziest Rating"

Parody Written by:

Melanie Lee

The Lyrics

Yes, this topic has been done to this song at least twice...and here am I to do it again! OS:
Ones are the laziest rating that the people do.
Truth can be devoid of fun;
If they hate what you’re saying, they’ll give 1-1-1.

You can’t be bothered to see how well I paced the words.
5-1-3 might be much fairer if my humor hurts.

‘Cause 1s are the laziest rating that you give to me!
1-1-1—such a cheap number! Stop! Look! See!

“It’s just no good”? Use your ears! See, I matched okay!
I invested time and tweaked the rhymes of yesterday.

Dems won’t give 5s to the rightists!
Repubs keep 5s from the leftists!
Ones are the partisan voting that you always do!
Ones are the laziest…
Ones are the laziest…
Ones are the laziest voting—that’s the way you boo!

My pacing’s good, but I fear that you’ll give to me…

(1-1- ) 1 is the laziest…
(1-1- ) 1 is the laziest…
(1-1- ) 1 is the laziest rating that you’ll ever pull!

(Oh, no!)
Libs won’t give props to the… (rightists!).
Cons will not high-5 the… (leftists!).
Ones are the laziest—honey, oh, those 1s are bull!

(1-1- ) Onnnnnnnnne!
(Ones are the laziest rating that the people do!)
(1-1- )
If you are too controversial, they’ll give 1s to you!
(1-1- )
One time, why don’t you examine someone’s rhythm, too?

Hmm...think this could apply to the stalemate in Washington, DC, too?

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 3.0
How Funny: 3.0
Overall Rating: 3.0

Total Votes: 12

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   6
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   6

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Susanna Viljanen - October 16, 2013 - Report this comment
Not ones, but fives! This was an excellent statement for those lurkers, who sputter on ones, without really bothering to either read or sing the parody and compare it to original. I think you pointed a real issue here.
Giorgio Coniglio - October 16, 2013 - Report this comment
Disagree with your contention. I am sure the critics who have been mono-splattering my efforts lately are motivated only by artistic conviction and my betterment. But your pacing is excellent and I couldn't stop laughing. 555. GioLio
Jaded - October 16, 2013 - Report this comment
All 1s because the topic has been beaten to death. No vote unless it has a comment to back it up.
Luke Five-rater - October 16, 2013 - Report this comment
Sorry, but using the OS over and over again for the same topic is also lazy, so 1s
Melanie Lee - October 16, 2013 - Report this comment
If someone can give this parody all 1s merely because "the topic has been beaten to death,' then that person has missed the point of this parody. Try again, and this time, read carefully.
Patrick - October 16, 2013 - Report this comment
There is no objective, quantitative way to judge a parody by a numerical standard. So, I don't. I may like one original song better than another. Or I might not know the original, which happens a lot these days. I'm a right winger, so leftists may attack my political views (which I expect). I sometimes go after a leftist's views. But I respect clever use of language and that is what should matter most here. In sports one can measure how far a ball was thrown, or how fast a runner covered 100 meters, or which horse crossed the finish line first. But how can one put a number on a high dive or a display of figure skating? Is a great performance of dance or skating diminished by the fact that I am not familiar with the music? I think the number system just isn't the way to judge what is an art form.
Jonathan - October 16, 2013 - Report this comment
wow... 4 1's? I guess we have some lazy "beeps" around these parts huh? well don't worry here are some well-deserved 5's!
Jaded - October 16, 2013 - Report this comment
I read and reread your parody carefully. Perhaps I was hasty in giving you straight 1s. Pacing was good. The case against voting, especially giving automatic 1s (and for that matter, automatic 5s) has been made dozens of times, and the conclusion has been either to eliminate this opportunity for reward/punishment, or to announce one's scoring in a comment. Aside from the previously mentioned subjective factors, how can one really separate out the components of a performance? There's a synergy at work. If the pacing is way off, the humor is ruined. If a gymnast does magnificent work on the balance bar and then finishes her landing flat on her back, there's a very big deduction. Moreover, the judges are visible and accountable. I judge Anthony Weiner. I may think he deserves 5s for intelligence and leadership, but I'm not going to let that counterbalance in any way his repeated indiscretion. So I give him an Overall Score of 1. I can't do that unless I give him 1s in the other categories.
Freshness and inventiveness of idea matter to me, and can overwhelm technical merit.
Melanie Lee - October 17, 2013 - Report this comment
Jaded: thanks for rereading and considering and commenting. Now first of all, I didn't say to myself, "What subject-song matches have been done over and over that I can do again?" Rather, I saw the persistent 1-1-1 ratings on songs that were perfectly or near-perfectly paced. This made me think of the Three Dog Night song. I didn't look closely at the other parodies until after I had finished my own. And yes, you can give a 5-1-1 rating if you want to! Your overall impression is up to you. And yes, you're right about the automatic 5-5-5s!
Callmelennie - October 17, 2013 - Report this comment
One time I did an Obama busting parody of "Surfing Bird" -- the song that starts with a harsh atonal voice going "a-Wella, everybody's heard about the bird; bird, bird .. bird is the word" ... A-wella anyhow, I spent HOURS making sure the infinite iterations and ad libs on "papa-ooma-mow-mow" completely matched the OS. Indeed, my spoof of Surfin' Bird comes the closest to the pace of the OS (by far) of any other parody of this song in the Amiright directory. And yet people who disagreed with my political stance still gave it a "1" for pacing. I guess they just couldn't forgive "Obama ummah Mao Mao; Obama doom Mao Mao Mao"
Melanie Lee - October 21, 2013 - Report this comment
Callmelennie: I'm pro-Obama, and I lol'd over that one line! I guess I'll have to check out your parody!
Melanie - August 06, 2015 - Report this comment
Callmelennie: I finally checked out that "Surfin' Bird" parody, the second version. I left a comment and a rating there.
Uno - August 06, 2015 - Report this comment
Rehashing from two years ago? 1s!

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