I keep hearing you're concerned I'm drowning in my beer
But all that thought you're givin' me
Is just for naught, my dear
But I'm not walkin' in your shoes, I'm sitting on this stool
And I'm not even bleary-eyed, I've not begun to drool

Chorus:
Countin' bottles on the wall
That don't bother me at all
Seagram's, Wild Turkey, Grey Goose
Oh, this turkey's gettin' loose
Watching football and I'm drinking Captain Morgan too
Now don't tell me that I'm feeling blue

Last night I saw those bottles
Blue and amber, green and gold
The place was dark and smoky
Lots of b.s.stories told
So please don't think I'm drowning dear
I didn't touch a beer
But bloody mary's, I drank some
Well, quite a few, I fear

Countin' bottles on the wall
Til someone shouts out last call
Dickel, Crown Royal, Grey Goose
Kahlua, Drambuie too
Watching football and I also tried some Malibu
Now don't tell me that I'm feeling blue

If I could see you I would say don't worry bout my life
The colored bottles look so pretty, sitting in the light
And I'll get accustomed to this thing called being free
So don't you listen to the rumours you're hearing 'bout me

Countin' bottles on the wall
Til someone shouts out last call
Stolichnaya, Absolut
Yes, I'm having quite a hoot
Watching football and I'm drinking Captain Morgan too
Now don't tell me that I'm feelin' blue

Now don't tell me that I'm feelin' blue