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Song Parodies -> "I'm a Retriever"

Original Song Title:

"I'm a Believer"

Original Performer:

The Monkees

Parody Song Title:

"I'm a Retriever"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

One of my adult children seems to have gone into the business of rescuing animals. Her latest animal is a German Shepherd that lost its left forelimb (via surgical amputation) most likely from injuries suffered by being hit by a car. Despite this handicap it can now play fetch as well as any other dog. It also pulls on its leash with an amazing amount of strength ...... And even though I'm old enough to remember "Monkeemania" I never parodied one of their songs before. So here goes
I thought Sheps were only bred for guarding things
Meant for sniffing drugs but not to chase
Oh, cops were out to use me
That's the way it seemed
Rescue moments haunted all my dreams

But then I saw her stick ..... Now I'm a retriever
Without a speck ..... of doubt in my mind
I'm a dog (woof) I'm a retriever
I couldn't leave her if I tried

I thought life was more or less a hellish thing
Seems the more I lived, the more I lost
Oh what's the use of romping
My one forelimb I'll strain
When I needed release, I'll feel pain

But then she said "Go fetch" ..... Now I'm a retriever
Without a hitch ... allowed in my stride
I'm a dog (DOG!) ..... I'm a retriever
I couldn't grieve her if I tried

Aaah, what's the use of living
All I've know is pain
When I needed shelter, I got maimed
But then I saw her face ..... Now I'm her retriever
Without a trace ..... of doubt on my part
I'm in love (Woof!) I'm her retriever
I'm just a theiver of her heart

Now I see her ball ..... Now I'm a retriever
Without a pall allowed in my mind
Said I'm a retriever yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Said I'm a retriever

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.0
How Funny: 4.1
Overall Rating: 4.1

Total Votes: 9

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   2
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   6

User Comments

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Jonathan Spurlock - May 13, 2019 - Report this comment
A Monkee's (TM) masterpiece! IMO the pacing was just about perfect--remember, TOS had some creative rhythm or meter, too, so outstanding work for a not-so-easy-to parody song. "When I saw this work/now I'm a believer/a lot more stuff/ I hope we will find/you did well/we are believin'/more stuff we'll be seein'/as you have time (guitar riff)!",
CML - May 13, 2019 - Report this comment
Cheer down, sleepy John; oh what can it mean for you to "Monkee" around with my emotions like this. You know, I was a kid when the Monkees "barreled" onto the scene, so some of their catchier songs have been earworms in my brain for over 50 years, so it wasn't very hard for me at all .......... One slight tweak I'd make in the third stanza would be "I FEEL loved" because the dog was abandoned in the street when very young
2Eagle - May 13, 2019 - Report this comment
That dog has a wonderful home.
Patrick - May 13, 2019 - Report this comment
I saw a three-legged dog once. Folks named it "Tripod". A very nicely done song. It's good to see a fun song here every now and then. Seeing things from a dog's point of view.
Jonathan Spurlock - May 13, 2019 - Report this comment
I remember the TV show as well. Maybe it was Friday evenings so it was okay for us school kids to view the programs. Some of the humor was a little over my head in those days but the music was always great stuff too! In fact, not long ago on one of the oldies TV stations, the entire series was aired on Sunday afternoons. Good memories!
CML - May 13, 2019 - Report this comment
It definitely wasn't Friday, John. For some reason, Tuesday comes to mind. I'm pretty sure it was on Tuesday
CML - May 13, 2019 - Report this comment
Aww, you're gonna make me blubber like a baby, 2Eagle. TY
Jonathan Spurlock - May 14, 2019 - Report this comment
Well, it was a long time ago! Regardless of when it was aired, it was a great show and much better than some (most) of the drivel that passes for entertainment these days.
CML - May 14, 2019 - Report this comment
I'm guessing that I was born a few years before you, Jonathan. I "arrived in '55" (that was the motto for all 1955 births --- not). So I have clear memories of the mid-Sixties. Friday was "Man from UNCLE" night, followed by "Wild Wild West" Now you ain't gonna broadcast a spoof of Beatlemania on the same night as a couple of James Bond spoofs, are ya? No, that would be overdosing on the Brit-referencing .... whatever the 'eff that means. So the Monkees MUST have been on some other night. I rest my case
Patrick - May 14, 2019 - Report this comment
My cousins would come over on Friday nights. We'd watch "Camp Runamuck", "Hank", and "The Man From Uncle". I don't remember what night "The Monkees" were on.
Jonathan Spurlock - May 14, 2019 - Report this comment
CML, you're right, you do have some seniority on me. I trust your recollections. BTW, did you or anyone ever build a model of the "MonkeeMobile"? That was one hot car!
Tilly - December 18, 2020 - Report this comment
When I was younger there was a cd we used to listen in the car all the time with this song in it. I really want to find it but don’t know who made it. It also spoke about boring uncle Dave. Do any of you know anything about it ?

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