Headline news today
Broken House displayed
From his border wall
Trump Dumpty's 'bout to fall

State of Union Man
Bad hair, tiny hands
Calls for unity
Claiming victory

TelePrompTer slowing down
Sounding out each single sound
Tries so hard to read the screen
On the fire throws gasoline

Intel chiefs are on parade
Contradict each point he made
Say, hey!!!!!

Fest'rin' Union...

Tit, for tat, for tit
Tit for tit, for tat
Diss for dat, for diss
Diss for diss, for dat
Tit, for tat, for tit
Tit for tit, for tat
Diss for dat, for diss
Diss for diss, for dat

Now Theresa May is
Mushy peas today, no deal!
With a backstop or without,
Brexit's like a turdlog forced out!

Jeremy Corbyn had to say
You've botched the job, get
Out the way!

(Balalaika solo)

Vladimir has got to say
Now everything has gone my way
Yay, yay!

Fractured Union...

Brits, and it's the pits
Fits and starts and fits
Shit, da Brexit it's
Bricks and bats to bits
Brits, and it's the pits
Fits and starts and fits
Shit, da Brexit it's
Bricks and bats to bits

Shake my freakin' head, 'cause
Seems democracy is dead
Fascists on the rise and
Donny loves all those guys

Fest'rin' Unions...
Oh, Tested Unions...
Fractured Unions...
Busted Unions...