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Song Parodies -> "I Saw Her Hand In There"
Original Song Title:
"I Saw Her Standing There"
Original Performer:
The Beatles
Parody Song Title:
"I Saw Her Hand In There"
Parody Written by:
Bob Gomez
The Lyrics
The eighth parody of this song to date, dedicated to Rick Duncan, still the king of Beatles parodies.
She was at least 83
And she sat next to me
On a Greyhound bus--
Why did I talk to her?!?
I woke from my nap with a shudder,
Whoa--
When I saw her hand in there!
Well, she gave a squeeze
And I asked, "Granny, please,
Do release your hold
On my testiculars!"
But she wouldn't pass up her druthers,
No!
And her paw was crammed in there!
Well, my mind said, "Ew!"
Cuz her hair was blue
And I felt her hand
On my weeeeee-nieeeee!
So we traveled that night
With her palm clamped on me tight
And before too long
I had become inured....
Then she put a half stick of butter,
Whoa!
And I warmed her hand in there!
What a long strange trip!
What a "Jaws" death grip!
With her strong firm hand
On my weeeee-nieeeee!
After 6 freakin' hours
Well, old Grams was smellin' sour
And I found no pulse
On her left jugular!
Well, she had collapsed,
Poor grandmother,
Oh!
With her claw still cramped in there!
Old rigor mortis hand in there!
Yeah, well, with my buttered clams in there!
And she sat next to me
On a Greyhound bus--
Why did I talk to her?!?
I woke from my nap with a shudder,
Whoa--
When I saw her hand in there!
Well, she gave a squeeze
And I asked, "Granny, please,
Do release your hold
On my testiculars!"
But she wouldn't pass up her druthers,
No!
And her paw was crammed in there!
Well, my mind said, "Ew!"
Cuz her hair was blue
And I felt her hand
On my weeeeee-nieeeee!
So we traveled that night
With her palm clamped on me tight
And before too long
I had become inured....
Then she put a half stick of butter,
Whoa!
And I warmed her hand in there!
What a long strange trip!
What a "Jaws" death grip!
With her strong firm hand
On my weeeee-nieeeee!
After 6 freakin' hours
Well, old Grams was smellin' sour
And I found no pulse
On her left jugular!
Well, she had collapsed,
Poor grandmother,
Oh!
With her claw still cramped in there!
Old rigor mortis hand in there!
Yeah, well, with my buttered clams in there!
©Bob "I Think I've Been Spending Too Much Time On Buses Lately" Gomez 2004
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Voting Breakdown
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| 5 | 24 | 24 | 24 |
User Comments
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I'm going to have this mounted in a plaque, take it to work, and tell everyone this was dedicated to me. Then I'm going to run like hell! Bob, this would be a great Twilight Zone episode. On cable.
"Twilight Zone", yeah.... or .... "Pole Train" ..... or...."My Granny Vise".....or....."Earth: Final Deathgrip" ....or.... "Regis and Smelly"....or...."Ballville".....or....."Clawson's Reek".....or....."SurviveHer".....?
Hehehehehe.
Bob, very funny parody, and this story is not so far fetched when riding on a Greyhound--I have some awful Greyhound tales myself
Oh man. And I thought the Crying Game was scary. Nice work. bob
And another one rides the bus... hold on, that's a different song. Congratulations, Bob, on providing something with a higher Ewwww factor than "Dubya Does Dallas"
Wolves have been known to chew their own legs off to get out of a trap...(555)
I'm surprised that there wasn't more off hand comments on this one. Still gotta hand it to you Bob. Rosie palm and her four sisters make five.
Damn, man, when they say "Leave the driving to us . . ." I like the multiple rhymes on the refrain line (her paw still crammed in there). But I gotta say, you have some seriously warped fantasies - or real bad luck on buses . . . Imagine riding on a Greyhound being groped by a grey hound . . .
Um, my warped fantasies don't make it onto this website. Besides, this wasn't a fantasy (at least I hope not)--it was a nightmare. I am the kind of person who tends to listen to people for too long on buses, so it kind of grew from there (no pun intended) (at least I hope not).......Thanks everybody. I still think we should plan a ParodyFest for next summer. Thoughts?.......d;:^)
Cute! Oh, well... when life gives you lemons... Was she seated next to Ratso Rizzo?
damn, that was sick...funny as hell, though...5s
Just think, had she been naked, where would she have kept her loose change? Good one bob!
Best. Parody. Ever. Or one of the best, anyway. Fantastic.
Funny enough (or not) I´ve actually been groped by a lady of that age, though it was from behind and a firm pinch at my buttocks.
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