In the news here in the morn'
Was a man who humped a couch
And he's into dolphin porn
With his hands on Donald's pouch

And for Veep he is to run
'Cos he has a lot of green
Number two down number one
With the ear of D's machine

With the based crowd he has a solid stance
Finance' JD Vance, MAGA's in a trance
Who can blame him for humping at the chance
Fire in his pants, when A-dolph advance'

Common sense is not onboard
Many pundits say o' twentyfour
But his memes are here to stay

Will the cat lady vote have him careened?
Drag down Donald's team? Bring cofefe-ine!
Should a VP be meekhead or obscene?
Pro or Con vaccine? Balancing The Mean?


HERE COMES A LONG BLATHERSKITE INTERLUDE
WITH BORING SOUNDBITES FROM CNN AND/OR FOX
DEPENDING ON WHAT FAKE NEWS DEALER YOU PREFER


As the pundits cut the cheese
Slinging mud at us
An' full of sleaze
Dems are blue
And some are green
Donald's orange
And libertine

It's all fresch as a glory hole latrine
Where they've spilled the beans, you know what I mean
Spice things up, bring out voodoo figurines
Have them guillotined, good taste smithereened

Basement incels are clapping with both hands
Hard by happenstance, futons get a glance
But will lady parts swing with JD Vance?
Into Donald's hands, or Kamala Land?