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Song Parodies -> "Playing Big Brother"

Original Song Title:

"Paperback Writer"

Original Performer:

The Beatles

Parody Song Title:

"Playing Big Brother"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

Playing Big Brother! (playing Big Brother…Brother! Brother!)
A TV contest that has got me hooked
I don’t need to sing, to run fast or cook
Too much trouble on “Apprentice”, there
I don’t want a job
So I will be a house guest on Big Brother
Playing Big Brother!

We’re locked in a house all the day long, man (*Juuuulieeee Che-ennnnn!)
And we cannot hide, that I understand
A wacky crew that is female and male (*Juuuulieeee Che-ennnnn!)
Some are off their gob
But we want to win that cash on Big Brother
Playing Big Brother!
Playing Big Brother (playing Big Brother!...Brother! Brother…)

Stay 1000 hours, now see how you do (*Juuuulieeee Che-ennnnn!)
Head Of Household thinks he’s the “big wazoo”
I hope I’ll stay in longer if I trick, use guile (*Juuuulieeee Che-ennnnn!)
Make my nose real brown
So I can kick him off of Big Brother
Win at Big Brother!

A crazy thing happened here last night
Someone in the dark just seduced me, right?
Now I have just learned, it was that dude named “Beer”
How much can I take?
Please just get me out of Big Brother!
Dump me, Big Brother!
Freakin’ Big Brother (no peanut butter!)
Freakin’ Big Brother (next try “Survivor”!)
Freakin’ Big Brother (maybe “Fear Factor”!)
Freakin’ Big Brother…
Copyright 2018, Agrimorfee

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.1
How Funny: 4.1
Overall Rating: 4.1

Total Votes: 16

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   3
 2   0
 3   1
 4   1
 5   11

User Comments

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Stuart McArthur - February 28, 2018 - Report this comment
One thing my mother drummed into me as a kid was never get caught in the dark with a dude named Beer, Ag - you live and you learn - and yes Big Brother is the one for contestants who have no other skills. Nice job 555
Peregrin - February 28, 2018 - Report this comment
Agri, disappoint me... But only because every parody I had read so far had made reference to the world's greatest airhead, Kim K. I was hoping for 100% across the board. But kudos to you for lifting yourself to a higher plain. And nice to see you went for one of the shows that started the reality rot, B.B.. Enjoyed the read and the pacing matched the song wonderfully. My favourite was the reference to "I don’t need to sing, to run fast or cook", which sort of got summed up by Stu's comment - no skills at all required - just turn up and be the dullard/dickhead/sexual deviant/Rhodes Scholar that you may be, and the world will love you for it. Or in my case, not! More 5s from the Southern Hemisphere.
Alexander's Rag Tag Band - February 28, 2018 - Report this comment
Those were the most uncelebrated celebrities I've seen.
Matthias - February 28, 2018 - Report this comment
This was funny. I never watched Big Brother or real any reality show... Ghost Hunters (a little), Mythbusters (a tiny bit), Pawn Stars (once or twice), Man V Food (occasionally) but the big ones I never seen. I liked this though even though I'm out of the loop. Don't mess around with Beer lol
Phil Alexander - February 28, 2018 - Report this comment
Didn't Big Brother start off with lofty "sociological study" sort of intentions? Which kind of didn't last until the second season, and has descended ever further into freakshow territory. Presumably because that's where the ratings are. Nicely skewered :-)
Claude Prez - February 28, 2018 - Report this comment
A lot of nice, clever subs, but Stu and Pip really said what I was thinking. Also, I love Beer, he's the best
JAB - February 28, 2018 - Report this comment
Never seen the show. Trailers along enough to make you gag. Nicely skewered indeed.
Jeff Reuben - March 01, 2018 - Report this comment
I get hooked on this one every few seasons. No interest in the celebrity version on now but I'll likely watch again in the summer. I agree on Claude with Beer. Well done.
Kristof Robertson - March 01, 2018 - Report this comment
“I don’t need to sing, to run fast or cook”...that there was the pivotal line, Agri, and the main reason I won’t ever watch B.B. If I want to watch losers sitting around whining, I’ll film myself at home. You’ve done a fabulous job nailing these no-marks. Bravo! 5s
Peter Andersson - March 01, 2018 - Report this comment
Glad someone covered the original reality show. I remember the very first season here had real people of different age, sex and occupations (most of them came from REAL jobs back then) so Phil's probably on to something, that since has been lost.
John Jenkins - March 02, 2018 - Report this comment
I have never seen the show, but I conclude that there is more artistic merit in this one parody than in all of the Big Brother episodes combined.
Agrimorfee - March 02, 2018 - Report this comment
Thanks for all the wonderful plaudits! @Peter (and anyone else), here is a brief look at the actual original "Reality TV" show -- . Perhaps someone would like to write another one for that? :)
Meriadoc - March 02, 2018 - Report this comment
The only reality TV show I ever watched ('cus my mom begged me to watch it with her one year when I was home on vacation). That was back when the show was in its first season. I gather it's just gotten worse since then...dunno who Beer is, but nice sub for Lear... - March 04, 2018 - Report this comment
Agrimorfee! This is like Old Home Week! (Probably because it is, in fact, Old Home Week.) You nailed the fact that Big Brother is the only reality show people with zero ability (like me) would ever do. (But I wouldn't anyway.) Also, I've met that dude named Beer. Quite a charmer. Oh, and hey, great parody. I think I've been forgetting to say that in all my comments to all you old farts. So, all you old farts: great parody!
Agrimorfee - March 04, 2018 - Report this comment
The mighty hath returned, and His words ringeth with blessings upon the Amiright brethren . So, how ya been big guy? THANKS!

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