I might be a bit biased, as I have actually seen Gianni perform "live." This parody embodies all of what makes this so funny! I think Gianni pays particular attention to "story line" development, and in the end, makes for a great song! Way to go Gianni!!!

I thought the idea was very clever, but I think it could have been funnier. Pacing seemed a bit forced, but overall, not a bad effort. 4-4-4.

not a bad effort at all

This one's a real bruiser!

Pacing a bit forced but overall a good story, loved it from the title on - 455.

(Amiright Idol) I'm with the above non-judges. 455...not that it wasn't matching syllable for syllable, but in singing terms, it will be somewhat difficult to spit out some of those choruses. But it was still a lot of fun.

(Amiright Idol) I certainly see the pacing people are talking about, however, I think I could make it work. More importantly you chose a popular song which is a good selling point to the general public, and the topic was excellent. Love the title sub, love the fun, love the parody!

Exactly what Aggy wrote. Normally when I give a 4 on pacing it means "not easily recordable as written, but only needs minor changes to work". In this case it's a high 4 - I think I'd have to practice singing this one more than usual to make it work, but it's singable, and funny.

Thanks for all of your positive comments. Particular thanks to Carmelita, who is joining the fun. I'm just not sure about the pacing issue. I've sung the song to myself quite a few times and I think it fits well. Could you guys give me a "fer instance"? Thanks agvin to all commentators

Line shape, my friend (Stu explains this so much better than I, but here goes...). First, to give an example you had:

OS Lyrics: I/THINK/I'm/GON-na/be/sad (111211)
Your lyrics: I/JUST/did/SOME-thing/real/bad (111211)

That is perfect line shape, i.e. all syllables are stressed as the original, all pauses are in the same place and the numerical notation is the syllable count per word, which is also the same as the original. It's simply impossible to screw up singing that line because your pacing is bulletproof there.

There's other spots where the line shape or emphasis on words doesn't flow this well, like "I/FEEL/KIND-a/bad/ in/SIDE" (1st, 2nd, 3rd 7th syllables naturally stressed), vs TOS's "SHE'S/GOT/a/TICK-et/to/RIDE" (1st, 2nd, 4th and 7th syllables stressed). What that means is that the word "kinda" has to be sung completely opposite of what seems intuitive to me, which is hard, or it is sung in its normal pronunciation, which means a slight meter change in that line for the singer to get the line to still scan.

This may seem like horrible nitpicking on my end, but IMO the number one thing that makes parodies hard to record (aside from egregious pacing errors) is words that have to be stressed completely backwards of convention. This seems especially true when such words are at the end of a line (you didn't have any such errors here though).

Thanks, Red Ant. I kinda figured that's what it was about, but I couldn't quite "hear" an example as I was singing in my head. In the example you gave, during performance, could you skip over the first syllable (I know that drops one from the line), add a slight pause, or somehow make it more "perfect"? I appreciate the feedback, as always.