[ACT ONE]
[SCENE SIX]

{Setting: Inside Bubba's Trailer}

(Jill keeps pacing the floor, as Billie keeps trying to heal Sue)
(Jill taps Billie on the shoulder)

JILL
"Is there anything I can do to help you, hun?"

BILLIE:
"Ma, I can handle my brother just fine. Don't worry"

JILL
"Are you sure?"

BILLIE
"Ma, I care about him as much as you do, don't worry"

(Jill grabs Justin's hand, and again brings him into the kitchen)

JILL
"Justin, there must be something I can do. I don't care what Bubba says"

JUSTIN
"Why don't you go see the Mayor about it?"

JILL
"He can do something?"

JUSTIN
"Well of course, he can but a restraint on the bar fights for one thing"

(Jill grabs Justin leans back and gives him a full French kiss)
(Justin is taken aback and falls to the floor)

JILL (wipes lips)
"Thank you! I owe you everything!"

JUSTIN (gasp of breath)
"Don't mention it"

(Jill grabs Justin's hand and runs out to the car outside)
(The hop into the car and drive off to the Mayor's office)

JUSTIN
"So about the Mayor. Will he hear out case?"

JILL
"Well, yeah, but he's not exactly the biggest buck in the woods"

JUSTIN
"What do you mean?"

"Incestual Story Of Arkansas Al"
By Kristof Robertson

(JILL)
Hey, Arkansas Al
Who's your best gal?
Your sister Sal?

Hey, Arkansas Al
That's immoral
Unnatural

He went to his white wedding with his still, hound dog and gun
Al's brother's mother's daughter is his chilluns' mom
He's an all-American, baccy-chawin' inbred redneck son
(Local preachers sing!)

Hey, Arkansas Al
Incestual
Arkansas Al

Hey, Arkansas Al
You'll go to hell
Or a jail cell

Deep in the Ozarks there's a lot of jealous guys
They're all Al's siblings, but that's not such a surprise
His kids are ugly and they squint thru all three eyes.
(Mutant children-things!)

Hey, Arkansas Al
Your first son, Cal
Is tripedal

Hey, Arkansas Al
Second boy, Mal
Partly fe-ral

The chillun asked him "Daddy, why do we walk weird?
And why does little Britney have a full-grown beard?"
It's sad when all your kin are cauliflower-eared
(Truly frighten-ing!)

Hey, Arkansas Al
You and your pals
Make love, anal

Hey, Arkansas Al
Sweet little Val
Barks, animal

Hey, Arkansas Al
Rights, conjugal
Quite illegal.