I
Shoulda known better than to touch that tube
Now I got sucked into watchin' a Stooge
And a Stooge, hey, hey, hey--
And a Stooge!

Oh, woh, I
Never realized what a twit could be!
They've become my three idols, you see--
Can't you see
My TV?

Moe sticks his fingers way up Curly's
Nose--
And hauls him halfway cross the ro-oo-oo-oo-oom, oh, oh--

And when Moe doinks him in the eye,
Eye, yi-yiiii!
It's Curly's pain and I'm bemused!

(Instrumental--hammers landing on skulls, knuckles cracking, noses crunching, etc.)

Tho-ose guys
Got a lotta drive but they're extremely slow!
If it's pre-Butthead, gotta give me Moe!
Give me Moe! Hey, hey, hey!
Give me Moe!

Tho-ose guys
Tried to fix the plumbing so hi-Larry-ous-ly!
There was a torrent flyin' out the TV!
It kills me--
So you see--

That when I tell you that I love Stooge
Shows,
I hope you say "nyuck-nyuck" and "woop-woop-woop," too, oh, oh--

And when I smash you in the eye
With a pie--
You're gonna say, "You lovely Stooge"
"You lovely Stooge"
"You lovely Stooge"