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Song Parodies -> "Fear and Loathing in Docklands"

Original Song Title:

"The Weight"

Original Performer:

The Band

Parody Song Title:

"Fear and Loathing in Docklands"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

Fear and Loathing Docklands*

Sing this to The Weight by the Band(with the chorus)


Shelter from the Storm by Bob Dylan(without the chorus)

(depending on the degree of regulatory sophistication of the audience)
I went down Canary Wharf feelin sick and full of dread
Too much regulation just buzzin around my head
It was all so confusin I really wish I could have stayed in bed
But when it comes to beautiful women I know - I'm just too easily led

All those codes in your handbook from MAR* to COB*
I can't decode your handbook
Its getting too (8 times)....
much for me

She was a high net worth investor she had diamonds on her fingers and toes
Dressed by John Galliano ........... platinum rings in her nose
And as I found out some time later in other places where it never shows.........
She was a dotcom millionaire and lottery winner in fishnet pantihose

So many codes in the handbook
From ENF to REC
Just cant decode that handbook
Its getting too (8 times)
much for me

She said the taxman was getting on her case - snappin at her six inch heels
I said there's no need for you to get all bent out of shape .... Tax planning is my special field
I'm sure that I can soon sort you out with a just a few judicious deals
You'll be able to afford a fleet of funky 4 wheeled drives.... When you park a few of my special purpose vehicles.......

So many codes in the handbook
From GEN to SUP
Just can't decode that handbook
Its getting too (8 times) .....
much for me

I didn't really do too much ... the odd investment here and there
A few offshore funds - a spot of forex -shorted some fast food shares
Of course I did have my suspicions but I kept quiet .....I really didn't care
I just wanted her money for the bank - fat bonus at the end of the year

So many codes in the handbook
From DEC to FIT
I can't decode that handbook
It's getting too, (8 times)
much for me

With the benefit of hindsight it seems obvious - all those red flags that I kept missin'
Like those brochures for minibreaks in Palermo - on the pinboard in her kitchen
And we never got a lie in on Sundays she was always busy with. weddings and funerals and christenins
And okay it's not a crime to like Frank Sinatra ....but she was too young for all that easy listening...

All those codes in the handbook
from TC to SYSC
I can't decode that handbook
Its getting too( 8 times)
.... much for me

like the first time she asked me back to her place she said I hope you're into canne..loni
but the only lottery she ever won was a numbers racket..
there was no dot com .. only alimony
in fact there were no facts in her factfile - almost everything about her was phony
And she might have mentioned the fact she just got divorced from Vito Corleone

All those codes in the handbook
Oh my Lord oh Goodness me
I can't decode that handbook
Its getting too (8 times)
....... much for me

Yes I can see it all so clearly now - before it was rather hazy
I know I'll have to sharpen up my act real fast.... I've been getting really slack and lazy
But all this guidance on the guidance on the guidance on the guidance man - it's a killer - it's drivin me crazy
And how I supposed to know that hedge fund she fancied was managed by a Genovese????

All those codes in the handbook
Lord help me woe is me
I can't decode that handbook
It's getting too(8 times) .......
much for me

Well I guess it's time to face the music I'm busted there's no denyin
What else can I do but put my hands up- say I'm sorry and try to mitigate the fine
But the thing that really really gets to me that keeps preyin on my mind
when she said I was the best thing she'd ever had - well that time I just know she wasn't lyin................

So many codes in the handbook
They make my brain hurt dreadfully
I can't decode that handbook
It's getting too (8 times)....
Much for me

* Docklands is part of the financial district in London where the UK equivalent of the Securities and Exchange Commission is based. . The acronyms all refer to various sections of the rulebook for trading securities etc

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 11

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   2
 4   0
 5   9

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

John Jenkins - May 17, 2005 - Report this comment
Regulators and regulations make good targets, and this is very well done. I particularly liked the rhyming and humor in the "ony" verse.
martha - May 18, 2005 - Report this comment
Hi John Thanks for dropping in! This is one of my favourite songs actually.. it always goes down well and I just love th OS .. hear it first in London in the summer of 1968.......a good summer it was so good I don't remember too much about it !!
Red Ant - May 19, 2005 - Report this comment
( ABC-F 05 ) DKTOS or much about what you are referring to but this song looks intensly laborious to parody, so props for that.
Adagio - May 23, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC05) DKTOS either song, but it looked so interesting. Great work! 5's
Guy - May 28, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC-F) Love the OS to this one. Been trying to get an angle on a parody to this song for some time now. You did this very well.
Rex - May 30, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC - F) DKTOS but appreciate the effort that obviously went into this.
Melhi - May 31, 2005 - Report this comment
(F) Nice work!
Johnny D - June 01, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) I know "The Weight", and whew --- wow --- Martha, you really burned some serious writer's calories putting this parody together!
Agrimorfee - June 02, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC05) Interesting. Paces better as the Dylan song, but at least I know "The Weight".Very literary work, Martha. I know diddlysquat about trade and securities, but I felt like I learned something about it today.
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - June 02, 2005 - Report this comment
Quite an effort, Marth Vader. I also feel enlightened on the nuances of the trade.
Charlie Decker - June 03, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) I agree that it paces better as "Shelter," (the chorus is particularly problematic, many more sylables than "The Weight" but in any case, you gave me a good excuse to listen to two of my favorite songs of all time.
Rick C - June 04, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC05) A weighty parody indeed....555
MysteryGoat - June 05, 2005 - Report this comment
Jeff Reuben - June 05, 2005 - Report this comment
Phil Alexander - June 06, 2005 - Report this comment
(yet) another DKTOS for this competition... ah well - another dead impressive song, MdT. Even if I don't know the original.
Kristof Robertson - June 06, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) Nice to see a London reference, and your rhyme schemes were great! 555
martha - June 08, 2005 - Report this comment
thanks for all the commnets and votes !!
Boborty - February 04, 2007 - Report this comment
i think it is a very good parody can you make a parody out of Sheila's Wheels for the Docklands by any chance thankyou you have done a very good job.

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