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Song Parodies -> "Shorn To Be Mild"

Original Song Title:

"Born To Be Wild"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Steppenwolf

Parody Song Title:

"Shorn To Be Mild"

Parody Written by:

John Davison

The Lyrics

Get my scooter running
Head out on the footway,
Living with dementia
And whatever comes my way.

Yeah, darlin’ gonna make it happen
Going down to the usual place,
Come down to the Pop-In Parlour,
Each day there’s a different face.

Slowing down to zero
At the Caffe Nero,
Feeling very festive
I finish my digestive.

Yeah, darlin’ gonna make it happen
Going down to the usual place,
Come down to the Pop-In Parlour,
Each day there’s a different face.

Get your haircut restyled:
Get it shorn - keep it wild?
With the price so high
I never want it dyed.
Shorn or stay wild?
Shorn or stay wild?

Get my scooter running
Head out on the footway,
Hairdressing adventure
And whatever comes my way!

Yeah, darlin’ gonna make it happen
Heading home via the library,
Need to use their public toilet
I gotta find my RADAR key.

Had my haircut restyled
Had it short, not so wild,
With the price so high
I never want it dyed.
Shorn to be mild,
Shorn to be mild.
The scooter mentioned is a powered mobility aid designed for use by a physically disabled rider on a paved footway or sidewalk. Caffe Nero is a brand of coffee/cake shop often present in malls, transport terminals and busy high streets. A "digestive", also mentioned in verse 3, is the colloquial term for a digestive or sweet-meal biscuit, a popular snack, usually circular, first developed in 1839 by two Scottish doctors, to aid digestion. The Royal Association for Disability and Rehabilitation (which became Disability Rights UK), worked in partnership with Nicholls & Clarke, the inventors of the "RADAR" lock to develop a National Key Scheme (NKS) across the United Kingdom. The first RADAR locks were fitted in 1981 to help safeguard wheelchair-accessible unisex toilets in public buildings and places of employment. A RADAR (pronounced radar) key as mentioned in verse 7 operates such locks when the particular toilet cubicle (or restroom, or changing room) is not already occupied. On the continent of Europe, a "Eurokey" performs a similar function; see CBF-DA

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