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Song Parodies -> "My New Exotic Job (Career Move To India)"

Original Song Title:

"The Ballad of Jed Clampet"

Original Performer:

Scruggs & Flatt

Parody Song Title:

"My New Exotic Job (Career Move To India)"

Parody Written by:

John Olmstead

The Lyrics

My New Exotic Job

(sung to the tune of the Beverly Hillbillies)


Please step into my office, I’ve got some news for you.
I know you heard the rumors, now you know they’re true
You’ve done a fine job for us and we’d really like to keep ya
Have you ever thought about a move to India?

(India that is, big country, lots of Hindu’s)


Before you give your answer, please think about this deal
And remember all the greeter jobs at Wal-Mart have been filled.
Its not that what you do for us is no longer needed,
It’s just your pesky salary that has been superseded.

(that is, you cost too much son, we can’t make bonus)

You’ll love the friendly people there; they smile and work all day,
and they all seem very happy on a fraction of your pay.
And for benefits, forget it they’re not needed there it’s true!
If you can’t work there’s a hundred more just like you in the queue.

(all lined up you see, waiting on your job, don’t call in sick now ya hear?)


This is your opportunity to see exotic places,
and to work for half your pay in a sea of happy faces.
We know this is a sacrifice you now are forced to make,
and we would not ask this of you but for the margins sake.

(Margins, That’s the stock were talking about)

Its not that we don’t make a buck, you have to understand,
we just don’t make enough to keep up with our plan.
Just think our heart is with you if you decide to go,
and if not, Well then you’re left out in the cold.

(cold that is, like the sign says, I will work for food)

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

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BombayBabe - July 24, 2008 - Report this comment
Bombs away to BomBay, Sir ! We have plenty of those "happy faces" here in norCAL . . . who work for a lot less, here in the US.
Tim Mayfield - July 24, 2008 - Report this comment
Well written. I am only confused by the line that they will work for only half what Americans make. I think that's overpayment in comparison.. See, the per capita income for an American is about $43,000 and well, the per capita income for an Indian is about $2,700. Not exactly half, if you know what I mean.
Ann Hammond - July 25, 2008 - Report this comment
he he
John Olmstead - July 25, 2008 - Report this comment
new last verse: And don’t think that for one moment we don’t understand your pain as we grab out golden parachutes and tumble off this plane. Cus After all you know these things go around in phases We’ll continue on each other’s board and vote each other raises. (raises that is, 30% a year if you’re a CEO, not a bad gig if you can get it)
John Olmstead - July 25, 2008 - Report this comment
Tim, I heard you, how does this sound: This is your opportunity to see exotic places, and to work for next to nothing in a sea of happy faces. John O.
Tim Mayfield - July 26, 2008 - Report this comment
John, love the new last verse, much better. Kudos!!

Do like the change for working next to nothing, but now the pacing is off one syllable. :-)
latest version - September 23, 2008 - Report this comment
My New Exotic Job (sung to the tune of the Beverly Hillbillies) Please step into my office, I’ve got some news for you. I know you heard the rumors, now you know they’re true You’ve done a fine job for us and we’d really like to keep ya Have you ever thought about a move to India? (India that is, big country, lots of Hindu’s) Before you give your answer, please think about this deal And remember all the greeter jobs at Wal-Mart have been filled. Its not that what you do for us is no longer needed, It’s just your pesky salary that has been superseded. (that is, you cost too much son, we can’t make bonus) You’ll love the friendly people there; they smile and work all day, and they all seem very happy on a fraction of your pay. And for benefits, forget it they’re not needed there it’s true! Cus there’s a hundred more just like you in the queue. (all lined up you see, waiting on your job, don’t call in sick now ya hear?) This is your opportunity to see exotic places, and to work for next to nothing in a sea of happy faces. We know this is a sacrifice you now are forced to make, and we would not ask this of you but for the margins sake. (Margins, them is That’s the stock were talking about) Its not that we don’t make a buck, you have to understand, we just don’t make enough to fund our bonus plan. Just think our heart is with you if you decide to go, and if not, Well then you’re left out in the cold. (cold that is, like the sign says, I will work for food) If you think you need to lean upon your faith its fine, as long as you are leaning don’t upset the bottom line Don’t forget our motto “Honor God in all you do” And if your god has seven arms we got a job for you. (having faith is fine, as long as it doesn’t get in the way of business) And don’t believe for one moment we don’t understand your pain as we don our golden parachutes and tumble off this plane. Just remember that we told you these things go around in phases and We’ll continue on each other’s board and vote each other raises. (Raises that is, 30% a year if you’re a CEO, not a bad gig if you can get it)

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