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Song Parodies -> "King Of The Ho's"

Original Song Title:

"King Of The Road"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Roger Miller

Parody Song Title:

"King Of The Ho's"

Parody Written by:

Dee Range

The Lyrics

After reading Kristof's awesome Creedence parody HOOKERS AT MY FRONT DOOR, I asked myself.."Where is the pimp? Here he is on Kristof's corner, singing to all who pass by
Hookers with tail for rent
Trojans just fifty cents
No bone? Small tool? No sweat
We still got Vi-AG-ra left

And yea, two hours of round-the-world
Will set ya back two bills per girl
I'm the man who cleans out yo' green
King of the Ho's

Two girl menage-a-trois
Blondes so tight they rub ya raw
No worn out crack-head cooze
Even got some Hunan flooze

We'll grope old fogies graveyard bound
Sportin' girls with lips renowned
I'm a man with queens from porn screens
King of the Ho's

BRIDGE

I work savory prostitutes that all pull a train
Most have some children, bad rubbers to blame
And silicone standouts in shimmering gowns
On every block that ain't blocked
With coppers around

I said
Hookers with tail for rent
Trojans just fifty cents
No bone? Small tool? No sweat
We still got Viagra left

See that old whore with push up bra?
Be like OeD-I-Pus...rent your ma
For the man who's weaned or not weaned....

I GOT THE HO'S

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.9
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 24

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

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AFW - May 31, 2005 - Report this comment
Funny plus...Roger would turn over and say, "Great parody!"
alvin rhodes - May 31, 2005 - Report this comment
ho ho ho...5s
Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd - May 31, 2005 - Report this comment
And the going price for Kristof's house, property and freebies is now of course 555$ for the whole shebang?
Azrepheal - May 31, 2005 - Report this comment
Brilliant. 5's
Kristof Robertson - May 31, 2005 - Report this comment
OMG! This is a work of art, Dee! So well written, I'd almost believe you have a degree in Pimpology. Bra-freakin-vo!! 555
Rick C - May 31, 2005 - Report this comment
My favorite of the day! LMFAO..5s
Meriadoc - May 31, 2005 - Report this comment
Around the world in 555 days?
Arwen - May 31, 2005 - Report this comment
Excellent, Dee!!
MrMacphisto - May 31, 2005 - Report this comment
5,5,5 for you, my Ho-liness.
Stuart McArthur - May 31, 2005 - Report this comment
HO HO HO and a bottle of (rethought that word) - thanks for covering the pimp's side to the story, Dee - the scene is fully fleshed now - 555
Dee Range - May 31, 2005 - Report this comment
AFW...I'll chug-a-lug to that....alvin 'rhodes scholar'...we have a female anatomy test you need to take, several times.....'Hard Peter' Anderson.....Freebies???My Ho's gotta eat to, man...freebies???.....Azrepheal....You must be undercover, man...or else want to be under some covers :-).....Meriadoc....around the world in 555 lays, or...50 lays with just one rubber, as Paul Simon once sang.....Arwen,Queen of the Hobbits....thank you, my precious...need a job :-)???......MrMac-Fist-O.....quit usin' the fist, my Ho's is pissed!.....General McArthur....Having sampled the flesh, I trust you shall return?
Dee Range - May 31, 2005 - Report this comment
Kristof, thanks for lettin' us operate in front of yo' crib...You want yo' cut in cash, or trade?
Kristof Robertson - June 01, 2005 - Report this comment
I'm not a greedy man, Dee...100 bucks a day and a BJ will suffice...;-)
Dee Range - June 01, 2005 - Report this comment
Kristof, the check is in the mail :-). The BJ is on the way also, is the form of a tribute to You and Spafford that Stuart and I cooked up last night. It is Called (Beep you) Spafford, (Beep you) Kristof.....a knockoff of Hello Muddah, Hello Faddah. Hope you like it :-)
Dee Range - June 01, 2005 - Report this comment
Rick C. I seem to have overlooked you in my thank you's. THANK YOU!!
Michael Pacholek - June 02, 2005 - Report this comment
Somebody's been to Nevada a little too often.
Agrimorfee - August 08, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC05) Ho, ho ho--King Giant! 455
Johnny D - August 13, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) Somebody's been to MY FREUDIAN SUBCONSCIOUS a little too often.
Stuart McArthur - August 13, 2005 - Report this comment
(K) - just rereading my last comment and dammit you're right again - I HAVE returned (where will his genius stop?) - hilarious Dee - "No bone? Small tool? No sweat" - ha! and re-reading also reminds me of our collaboration starting here, which we must do again - what a nostalgic read!
Jeff Reuben - August 13, 2005 - Report this comment
ABC: Not to be mistaken for the 'other' sugar daddy, King Of The Ho-ho's. Very funny, well done!
Red Ant - August 13, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC05) Well, I don't like pimps but this parody is funny. 555
Scathe - August 15, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC-K) Truly twisted.
Armstrong - August 15, 2005 - Report this comment
"No bone? Small tool? No sweat" BRILLIANT!!!
Alpha Skua - July 12, 2018 - Report this comment
Brains are not a big thing with California Liberals they just get more stupid and rediculous each day

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