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Song Parodies -> "Downtown 2003"

Original Song Title:


Original Performer:

Petula Clark

Parody Song Title:

"Downtown 2003"

Parody Written by:

Stray Pooch

The Lyrics

Remember how "downtown" used to be? Hasn't it all changed just a bit? Here is an update to Pet Clark's big hit from the sixties.
When you're alone and life is making you lonely, you can always go - downtown.
Where all the drunks and all the pushers and junkies want to steal your dough - downtown.
Just listen to the orders of the mugger as he robs you.
Linger on the sidewalk and you'll see a passing slob who
begs for a dime.
The lights are all shot out there.
You're likely to end your evening in intensive care,
when you're . . .

Downtown, where you can see the sights.
Downtown, don't you love urban blight?
Downtown, you won't survive the night there.

Don't hang around when you hear that gunshot sound, best not be movin' slow - downtown.
Maybe you know a little place you can go with dirty movie shows - downtown.
Abandoned buildings burning like a giant supernova,
Step into the crosswalk and they'll surely run you over.
How can you win?
It's easy to score some crack,
But when you reach for your wallet, you'd best watch your back
when you're . . .

Downtown, Salvation Army stores.
Downtown, Iron bars on all the doors.
Downtown, get caught up in gang wars now.


And you may find somebody blind who you can steal some change from.
Maybe if you're lucky you will hear a wild, deranged bum,
Screaming at you . . .
Hey, didn't I see you there?
Weren't you the one dressed in fishnets, with dark facial hair
I saw . . .

Downtown, homeless in bathoom stalls,
Downtown, hate slogans on the walls,
Downtown, screw it, let's hit the malls now!!
Copyright 2003 Stray Pooch

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.4
How Funny: 4.6
Overall Rating: 4.6

Total Votes: 42

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   2
 2   2
 3   1
 4   11
 5   26

User Comments

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Royce Miller - February 20, 2003 - Report this comment
I love it
John Jenkins - February 20, 2003 - Report this comment
Well constructed - good ending.
Tim Hall - February 23, 2003 - Report this comment
Great parody of urban blight. You must have recently visited downtown Las Vegas. BTW,thanksforthecomplimentsregardingmydangoleKingoftheHillparody. (ala Boomhauer)
Rice Cube - March 02, 2003 - Report this comment
That's a riot (no pun intended) ;-) I liked the part about the bearded guy in fishnets.
Mike Florio - March 11, 2003 - Report this comment
Wow...this is an awsome parody!
Meriadoc - March 19, 2003 - Report this comment
This is great! How did I miss this one earlier? :-D
Peregrine - March 19, 2003 - Report this comment
This was very good ! Great job !
Rick D - December 22, 2003 - Report this comment
Not only did you and Mari have a connection on the copier issue, but you and I are on the same wavelength with this one.
Rod Worden - April 17, 2004 - Report this comment
Made me LOL in places, very funny and well done thruout! 5s.
Bret - October 31, 2005 - Report this comment
Superb. This part is especially good: "It's easy to score some crack, But when you reach for your wallet, you'd best watch your back." Work on a one-to-one syllable match up and stressing the natural syllables. For instance, "You're likely to end your evening in intensive care," apparently stresses TO. That could be rephrased to something like: " You'll likely ROUND out your EVEning in inTENsive care" or "You'll likely END up this EVEning, in inTENsive care". "Maybe you know a little place you can go with dirty movie shows" needs to align better metrically with "Maybe you know a little place you can go where they never close." Something like: "Maybe you know a little place where they SHOW some dirty VIdeos". Do you mind if I sing your version at Karaoke and credit you?
mandamoo - April 02, 2008 - Report this comment
This is great! Well done !
Claude Prez - July 18, 2014 - Report this comment
Okay, I'm glad I'm doing this Classic du jour thing, if only because I'm rectifying the fact that I've never commented on some of my favorite Amiright parodies of all time, like this one, one of the first I noticed here. Great stuff!

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