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Song Parodies -> "Bleedin' on a Jet Plane"

Original Song Title:

"Leaving on a Jet Plane"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Peter, Paul & Mary

Parody Song Title:

"Bleedin' on a Jet Plane"

Parody Written by:

Warren Baker

The Lyrics

After I finished writing this, I discovered a similar take on this by Marty and the Martinettes (Grievin' on a Jet Plane), which is definitely worth a read. Below are just a few of my thoughts on air travel and the price of convenience.
Oh the flight is maxed
And crunched in our rows
We’re rear to rear
And toe to toe
The pilot cracks me up, “Enjoy the ride!”
My behind is achin’
My shoulders sore
A guy is sleepin’
He’s startin’ to snore
Sardines are better packed, at least we’re dry.

They’re nicklin’ and dime’n me
Help is just a modest fee
Peanuts cost you twice the price of gold
(just paying through my nose)
I’m bleedin’ on a jet plane
The front chair is leaning back again
But, hey, my chair it floats!

These are simple crimes
Above the ground
Divine design
A hostage crowd
Ten thousand feet and you can’t leave the plane
In a space for one
They’re seating two
For a Jackson note
They might feed you
If you want snacks, you’ll pawn your wedding ring

I’m twisting inside my seat
Blood won’t flow into my feet
Guy nearby is wearing foul cologne
(or maybe, a week old scone)
I’m bleedin’ on a jet plane
I don’t think I’ll feel my back again
At least I’ve got my Doan’s.

Flying time
Will often grieve you
Or the lines
And price will peeve you
You blink your eyes, and money’s flown away
North or south
Your luggage gone
Or east or west
Your hope forgone
Volcano says, “Your flight has been delayed”

So traveling is fun for me
Fun just like lobotomies
Give me drugs and put me in the hold
(and blanket, ‘cause it’s so cold)
I’m bleedin’ on a jet plane
I just hope they’ve got a finance plan
Have airlines sold their souls?
Copyright 2010 Warren Baker. More flights of fancy at the Blogging Baker.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 3   0
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User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Patrick - April 19, 2010 - Report this comment
Wonderful imagery. Makes me glad in a way that I don't have anywhere to fly to. After 9/11 I had this fear that the security drone would decide my shoe laces were some type of garrote and when the taser wore off I'd wake up in Guantanamo. Wasn't there some airline that was planning to install pay toilets on its flights?
Mark Scotti - April 19, 2010 - Report this comment
Great write! Many great points...
UnKNOWNvotress - April 19, 2010 - Report this comment
Sir, how about ' Breeding on a Jet Plane ' ? ? Now that would be humorous, especially for those who are active members of the 10,000 Club ! !
Timmy1000 - April 19, 2010 - Report this comment
That's why I stay away from planes - could also be the ash flying over from Europe. Good thought Votress.
Phil N - April 19, 2010 - Report this comment
So true, 5's
Warren Baker - April 20, 2010 - Report this comment
Patrick- Thanks for the v/c. I think that airline, er, 'canned' that idea!
Mark- Makes you want to take the bus, doesn't it? Thanks for the v/c.
Votress- Breeding? He he! I sure you just gave some of our best innuendo parodists a great idea!
T1K- See Votress comment.
Phil- Thanks for the v/c, sir!
Jonathan S. - April 21, 2010 - Report this comment
This parody is just plane awesome and even funnier when I pictured it being sung by the original artists. 555
Warren Baker - April 21, 2010 - Report this comment
Thanks Jonathan for the v/c. The thought of a folk group singing about the inconveniences of plane travel is pretty funny when you think about it!
Fiddlegirl - April 21, 2010 - Report this comment
Too funny-- and too true! But when *your* imagination takes flight, it's always a great trip :)
Warren Baker - April 21, 2010 - Report this comment
Thanks FG, and truly welcome back. Hope you'll grace us with some verse before long.
Meriadoc - April 21, 2010 - Report this comment
This was great! Too many funny lines to mention, but the sardine one was my fave.

Warren, you may want to check out one of our oldies in a similar vein:

http://www.amiright.com/parody/70s/thepartridgefamily2.shtml
Warren Baker - April 22, 2010 - Report this comment
Thanks for the nice comments Meriadoc! And also thanks for sticking that Partridge family song in my head...now I have this odd desire to paint a school bus.

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