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Song Parodies -> "How Do You Solve A Problem Like Corona"

Original Song Title:

"How Do You Solve A Problem Like Maria"

Original Performer:

Patricia Neway, Dorothy Dallas, Elizabeth Howell

Parody Song Title:

"How Do You Solve A Problem Like Corona"

Parody Written by:

Melissa Rudd

The Lyrics

This is a version of How Do You Solve a Problem Like Maria set in the present day. There is a Maria figure, as well as nurses, Dr. Fauci, and pharmaceutical reps from Pfizer and Moderna. This song has an interactive plot, and lines are sung by different people as shown below:
Nurse 1: She carelessly approaches me, a mask she does not wear
Nurse 2: She gathers where the crowds amass and sneezes everywhere
Nurse 3: It isn't sanitary, but she doesn't seem to care./ She's going to spread the dreaded Coronavirus!

Nurse 1: She always mocks precautions...
Nurse 2: But the danger still is real!
Nurse 1: She visits older relatives...
Nurse 2: And joins them for a meal!
Nurse 3: I hate to have to say it, but I very firmly feel/ She's going to spread the dreaded Coronavirus!

Maria: I'd like to say a word on my behalf!
Nurse 1: Then say it, spreader of Corona!
Maria: Corona makes me laugh! [laughs]

All nurses: How do you solve a problem like Corona?
Dr. Fauci: How do you bend a curve and keep it down?
Pfizer and Moderna Reps: How do you find a shot that beats Corona?
All nurses: And what are we all to do until it's found?

Dr. Fauci: Many a thing you know you'd like to tell them/ Many a thing they ought to understand/ But how do you make them stay (Nurses & Pharmaceutical reps: at home] and listen to all you say/ And keep six feet apart and wash their hands?

All: Oh how do you solve a problem like Corona?
Nurse 3: Keep six feet apart and wash your hands!

[Nurse 1 and Moderna Rep disappear, infected by Covid, then reappear]

Nurse 2: It's far worse than common flus/ Much more harmful - read the news!
Maria: I'm contagious without knowing that I am!
Nurse 1: Unpredictable as weather, hoping soon I will get better/ But not knowing if I'm one of those who can!
Moderna Rep: When I have it I'm distressed, fever, cough and short of breath,
Nurse 1 & Moderna Rep: Our lungs are no longer working as they were!
Nurse 3: It's not gentle, it is wild/ Save yourself, protect your child!
Dr. Fauci: Quarantine, just stay at home and do not stir!

[Maria has a change of heart from seeing the people she's infected]

All: How do you solve a problem like Corona?/
How do you bend a curve and keep it down?/
How do you find a shot that beats Corona?/
And what are we all to do until it's found?
Many a thing we really should be doing,/

Maria: Many a thing I've come to understand!

All: We know that we ought to stay at home,/ And listen to what they say/ And keep six feet apart and wash our hands,/ Oh how do you solve a problem like Corona?

All nurses: Keep six feet apart and wash your hands!


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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 2.4
How Funny: 2.4
Overall Rating: 2.4

Total Votes: 21

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   13
 13
 13
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   1
 0
 1
 
 4   0
 3
 1
 
 5   7
 5
 6
 

User Comments

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Michael Pacholek - November 19, 2021 - Report this comment
How do I solve a problem like Corona? Buy a better beer.
Sohrab Lutchmedial - November 20, 2021 - Report this comment
I won't cry at your funeral.
The Knack - November 20, 2021 - Report this comment
But at the very least, if you're stuck with Corona, dont drink nine of them Because then you may need to have your wingman run, your wingman run ... to save you from the error of the NINE CORONAS!
"Died Unexpectedly" - November 21, 2021 - Report this comment
Google it!

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