I inched my new walker to your bedroom last night
Tried copulatin'...you stroked out at the sight
I can't believe that you're a hundred three
With a little make-up you still pass for nine-ty

Chorus

I've got a brand new pair of denture plates
You've got a brand new knee
You could spend half a lifetime countin' the
Liver spots on me
I've been havin' bad dreams awhile
Kevorkian got free
Oh, I'm gonna move into another state
In case he's after me

I gum my food, can't urinate, keep teeth in jar
Heart beats too slow, but it ain't stopped so far
For somebody almost dead, still got that gleam in my eye
My doctor let me give Viagra a try

I asked the doctor, if we had much time
He said yes, but it won't be prime
Oh, we love to scare, the kids at Haloween
The see us alone, we're white as most ghosts they've seen, well

I've got a brand new set of denture plates
You got a brand new knee
You could spend half a lifetime countin' the
Liver spots on me
I've been fallin' to ground awhile
Hip replacement or three
I've got a brand new set of denture plates
You've got a brand new knee