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Song Parodies -> "Super-duper gagging order sleb-rity injunction"

Original Song Title:


Original Performer:

Mary Poppins Soundtrack

Parody Song Title:

"Super-duper gagging order sleb-rity injunction"

Parody Written by:

Phil Alexander

The Lyrics

There's a new word that's been making the rounds recently, a "Super-injunction". If you have a dreadful secret that you don't want the world to know about, you can take out an injunction to stop the press from printing anything; an almost inevitable corollary to this in this age of internet gabble is the news of the injunction spreads, so everyone knows anyway.

A super-injunction is one where you're not even allowed to mention the existence of the injunction, on pain of a "contempt of court" legal action. The inevitable corollary to *this* is that people can (and do) make up stories about celebrities and pretend that they're covered with a superinjunction to make their lies seem more plausible... because to sue for contempt of court will prove the stories to be true. Which rather defeats the object.
Some legal fiddle-faddle, schtumm till you die
Some legal fiddle-faddle, schtumm till you die

Super-duper gagging order sleb-rity injunction
You don't know what you don't know 'cause that's its prim'ry function
Mention someone on it and you're sued without compunction
Super-duper gagging order sleb-rity injunction

Dumb legal twaddle-riddle, some kid'll sue
Dumb legal twaddle-riddle, some kid'll sue

It's making us afraid to speak
When mentioning a name
For if they think you caused a leak
You'll soon be in the frame
And then you will be made to pay
But I don't think that's fair:
How can you know what not to say
If you don't know it's there?

Super-mega-giga-tera-peta-fied injunction
Can't say who did what to whom you saw on Clapham Junction
Ain't it quite enough to make you vomit up your luncheon?
Super-mega-giga-tera-petrified injunction

Some bitter twitter critter, dumb twit'll lie
Some bitter twitter critter, dumb twit'll lie

And now we find some Twitter twits
Who're telling sorry tales
About who's got injunctions out
With all sordid details
I guess we'll find the truth of it
When charges, they are brought
If they get charged with libel,
Or if it's contempt of court

Even to admit it's there is a legal malfunction
If you break one, a policeman hits you with his truncheon

He got a gagging order, hey, so can I
He got a gagging order, hey, so can I

So if you've been a naughty boy
There's no need for dismay
Just get out an injunction
So then nobody can say
But better use it carefully
Or they might change the law
To cover up hypocrisy
Ain't what the law is for

Super-mega-giga-tera-petrified injunction
(Just to sing this parody's illegal, I've a hunch on)
Super-duper gagging order sleb-rity injunction

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.9
How Funny: 4.9
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 8

Voting Breakdown

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 4   1
 5   7

User Comments

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Phil Alexander - May 16, 2011 - Report this comment
Forgot to mention - thanks to the current issue of Private Eye for supplying the inspiration for this.
Claude Prez - May 16, 2011 - Report this comment
Outstanding as usual Phil.
Wendy Christopher - May 16, 2011 - Report this comment
Well, someone somewhere on this site was eventually going to write about the super-injunctions - and I'm so glad it was you, Phil, because you've done it brilliantly! Masterful lyrics, great pacing and funny as heck, as always. I'm going to slip you a 555 in a plain browm envelope (but I never said that, and you can't prove I did...!)
Rob Arndt - May 16, 2011 - Report this comment
Phil, the current longest words are Antidisestablishmentarianism and for medical- Pneumoultramiscroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis!!! FYI
Bruno - May 16, 2011 - Report this comment
Love the rhymes, pace and humour. Very slick. 555 for making me laugh.
Puto - May 16, 2011 - Report this comment
LOL Funny! - 5z
Tommy Turtle - May 16, 2011 - Report this comment
@ Rob Arndt: I used pneumono... in a parody, although it was brutally mangled and broken up into actual words in the parody. (Cleverly so? You be the judge):

Phil, why am I thinking of George Orwell? It's not far from Speech Police to Thought Police.... what a shame that the country whose Magna Carta, Enlightenment Thinkers, etc, inspired the US Bill Of Rights, the First Amendment of which was precisely about free speech, seems to be moving backwards. Sorry to hear it, but superbly told tragedy.

And aren't you glad you have TT to recognize the orders-of-magnitude progression's clever switch from "peta-" to "petrified? :-D

555, and for a follow-up, do you know the old US TV sitcom, "Petticoat Junction"? (not that you should, it was stupid). Turn it to "Petty Injunction" or something. Cheers.
TT PS - May 16, 2011 - Report this comment
"giga" could have been "gag-a", and "tera", "terror"

"Super-make a-gag, a terror-petrified injunction" -- *after* setting it up with the orthodox words the first time or two. Just a thought.
John Jenkins - May 16, 2011 - Report this comment
How can you know what not to say
If you don't know it's there?

Very well done, Phil.
Phil Alexander - May 17, 2011 - Report this comment
Thanks, everyone :-)

Claude - Hi, long time no see..

Wendy - I'm sure there have been lots of other parodies about super-injunctions, but we weren't allowed to see them

Rob - my, you've been busy lately.. at this rate, you'll be getting to the thousand mark before me (and I have a 9-year head start). Re long words, I think Kristof has pipped us all with the classic Welsh village name ( )

TT - I'm of the opinion we ought to have a proper privacy law, with the implications for press freedom openly debated rather than the rich man's injunction to combat the obscene intrusions of the popular press. I do like your "Super-make-a-gag" line, though: if it's OK with you, I'll use that when I try performing it.

JJ - that catch-22 has always kind of confused me...
Tommy Turtle - May 17, 2011 - Report this comment
Phil, *of course* it's OK to use the line; I'd be quite proud. But if you make a big commercial success out of the song, well, some small share of the royalties would be appropriate. ;-D

(don't worry about getting £10 or so for an occasional gig -- no charge :) -- though of course I hope you make millions with it ;-D)
Arwen - May 19, 2011 - Report this comment
LOL...too funny, Phil...and expertly executed, as usual. Loved this. :)

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