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Song Parodies -> "Teen Angel"

Original Song Title:

"Teen Angel"

Original Performer:

Mark Dinning

Parody Song Title:

"Teen Angel"

Parody Written by:

Patrick McWilliams

The Lyrics

Defining musical moment. True story. When I was around 6 or 7 years old I saw Dick Clark accede to the entreaties of his female audience and refrain from playing "Teen Angel", because, they cried, it was "too sad". Naturally, I just had to hear it. When I finally did, I thought it was "too dumb". Even then I realized a loose ring inside a car would stand a much better chance of escaping unscathed from a train collision than would a teen age girl. Running back to save a boyfriend, romantic and courageous. Going back to save his ring, when you are both safely out of the car, stupid. At least she didn't pass on her genes.
That gloomy night, I stalled my car
A train came round the bend
You ran to save my high school ring
Then you went back again

Teen Angel, please be careful
Teen Angel, makes me scare-ful
There's about to be a wreck
Just stay right here and save your neck

What was it there in my old car
That you would go back twice?
You shouted "Catch!" and threw to me
A pair of fuzzy dice

Teen Angel, now I'm fretful
Teen Angel, I'm regretful
Notify her next of kin
She's run back to my car again

A broken car, a speeding train
Could not imagine worse
She's looking now beneath the seat
Where she forgot her purse

Teen Angel, how I miss you
You are gone, I can not kiss you
All I do is sit and sob
And hold my custom gearshift knob*

Teen Angel, slow at learning
Teen Angel, kept returning
Pawned my ring, it brought me luck
The jeweler gave me fifty bucks

Teen Angel, where are you now?
*She went back and took the knob off the gearshift lever.

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.4
How Funny: 4.6
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   1
 3   0
 4   0
 5   4

User Comments

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Teen Turtle - September 16, 2010 - Report this comment
Where the heck are the v/c? This is a first, perhaps -- retelling the same story as TOS, "slightly modified". Superb concept, and LOL @ "fuzzy dice".
  In all fairness, the ring might have been squished into a flat piece of metal, lost in the debris, or melted into the car's metal, and teens aren't exactly known for excellent judgment. :) If the car merely stalled, couldn't she get out on her own? ("I pulled you out....")
  Just part of the general run of car-death and teen-death songs (there were a whole slew) after the death of James Dean (look it up.)

555, and the Darwin Parody Award.
Old Man Ribber - September 16, 2010 - Report this comment
I'm here Turtle - and late as usual. I LOVE this! As Doctor Phil might say..."What was she thinking??. Great job, Patrick! ;D
AFW - September 17, 2010 - Report this comment
The Turtle and OMR are very right...satire and sarcasm put to it's best use...especially liked the "Saving the fuzzy dice bit", and the shift knob..nothing funnier than using exaggeration to spoof a cornball fictional tragedy, like this .. would also be a great idea for an SNL sketch...esp. for us over forty groupies
Patrick - September 17, 2010 - Report this comment
I was concerned at first that nobody would see this one. Glad you all liked it. Thanks for the insight into the James Dean/Teen Angel/Tell Laura I Love Her/Last Kiss connection. Look up "I Want My Baby Back" and "Little Dead Surfer Girl" if you can find them. AFW, I could see this as an SNL skit. If anyone from NBC is looking at this site, give me a call. There are enough clues in my writings to find me. I would even stay up past my bedtime to watch it.
TT - September 17, 2010 - Report this comment
Had forgotten about "Want Baby Back" until you mentioned it. Try "Endless Sleep", "Patches" (parodied in three different spins by yours truly) ... and even the Stones got into it a decade later, with "Paint It Black", though that was probably no longer following the Dean trend. Oh, and "Leader Of The Pack" -- corny, but kitschy enough for good parody; one parody of it was actually recorded and got a good bit of airplay -- still does, on Oldies stations: "Leader Of 'The Laundromat".
More... - September 17, 2010 - Report this comment
"Running Bear", "Moody River", and the eerie/creepy/spooky, ""Laurie (Strange Things Happen)", which some claimed was based on a true incident. - TT
Margie - January 05, 2019 - Report this comment
I hadn't really paid attention to the lyrics of "Teen Angel," but now that I've read them, I totally agree that they are worthy of being parodied. I listened to the song as I went through the lyrics of this parody, and they could easily be sung to the original music.
Brian - April 04, 2021 - Report this comment
in the early 60's there was a parody called teen burglar. Does anyone have those lyrics?

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