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Song Parodies -> "Doomsday Mornin' Comin' Down"

Original Song Title:

"Sunday Morning Coming Down"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Kris Kristofferson

Parody Song Title:

"Doomsday Mornin' Comin' Down"

Parody Written by:

Airfarcewon

The Lyrics

Well, I wake up, Friday mornin'
On the calendar's December twenty-one
Somewhere radios are blarin'
"It's the end!" - outside, I'm starin' at the sun..
It's a giant ball of crimson flame
And fallin' with a sonic speed, like none
I bend down, pull on my cowboy boots,
I guess that prophet's right, it's here, Doomsday..

I light and puff a Newport king
And feel my chest to see if my heart's tickin'
It is, so kick the fat ho from my bed where she has been
Since last night's trickin'
Then I microwave some water, spoon the coffee
In a cup, when steamed, I'm lickin'
Now, I'm forced to watch a movie of my life
That's quickly flashin' thru' my mind..

On the New York mornin' sidewalk
Sinners gather, pray and sing
Like the services on Sunday,
Across the city church bells ring
All the people brace for dyin'
Instant religion gains some ground
Begs of mercy fill the sidewalks
Doomsday mornin's comin' down

Out in DC wheels start turnin'
All the government's big brains are quickly thinkin'
Then, the Secretary of Defense says
"We need Heston," without even blinkin'
Fetch his body from the crypt, nuclear scientists
Get him alive, and winkin'
Then they stand him up on Times Square
And "Behold! My mighty power!" have him say...

Falling sun parts in the center,
Two halves fly harmless into space
And in less than half an hour
The sun's rejoined, back in place
Now that no one's marked for dyin'
The bars refill and sins abound
No more singin' on the sidewalk
Doomsday mornin' won't come down

On this Friday mornin' sidewalk,
Heston's hailed, and blessed, and cheered
Then good people head on homeward
Soon, they all have disappeared
Heston ass-kicked Armageddon,
And saved the World on this cold day
Now the Liberals might forgive him
For his stand on NRA....

Now the Liberals should forgive him
For his stand on NRA....

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Pacing: 5.0
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Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 10

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User Comments

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C2C AM Addict - August 20, 2012 - Report this comment
Interesting and funny tale-555. The 12/21/12 date is supposed to be the end of the Mayan calendar, but some supposed experts say there were some math errors and that the calendar actually ended about 14 years ago. Other supposed experts say the end of the Mayan calendar, although much longer in duration, is no more significant than the end of our annual calendar - it just ends and a new period starts. Others say that it marks the periodic passing of the sun across the the equatorial plane of the Milky Way galaxy where it is exposed to more than the usual amount of energy emanating from the galactic center. Still others say that by definition the sun is always on the equatorial plane of the galaxy. In other words it's all a bunch of nonsense purported by some alleged experts. It makes no sense to predict the end of the world will occur on a specific date, since you won't be around to get credit for your prediction if it's correct, and you will be around to be regarded as a laughingstock if your prediction is wrong.
Patrick - August 20, 2012 - Report this comment
I am a big fan of doomsday novels and films. I liked the imagery of a dissolute character climbing out of bed on doomsday and kicking out the hooker. Not all that different in spirit from the original song. Then all the people getting religion when they see the terror in the sky. Of course, when the earth is saved, the other salvation goes by the wayside and everyone is back to their old routines of drinking and carousing. A realistic scenario, assuming you can tie Moses together with the Resurrection.
Rob Arndt - August 20, 2012 - Report this comment
AFW-555!!! Btw, the old Mayan calendar only gets attention b/c it was the most accurate of calendars nearest a 365.25 year. 12/21/12 is just the beginning of a new cycle and is not the end. I would worry more about the Jewish High Holy Days of Tishri in Sept/Oct 2012, especially if Israel attacks Iran unilaterally (and possibly Syria and Lebanon as well).
AFW - August 20, 2012 - Report this comment
Thanks, to C2C, Patrick, and Rob
Meriadoc - August 20, 2012 - Report this comment
You had me laughin' at the 'ho' and I pretty much continued from there on... :D
WarrenB - August 20, 2012 - Report this comment
Lots of great lines including "Heston ass-kicked Armegeddon"- what a neat line in a twisted plot. Almost sounds like a Troma film! Not familiar with the original song, but the parody was an easy, kick-ass read.
AFW - August 20, 2012 - Report this comment
Thanks, Meriadoc, and WarrenB...My aim was to keep it grass-rootish like, Kris did
Brock O'Brahma - August 20, 2012 - Report this comment
Good to see one of my favorite actors, Chuck Heston, throwing Armageddon under the bus. He didn't fare too well in the dystopian futures of, "Planet Of The Apes", "Soylent Green", and "The Omega Man" (although his blood saved the day in that one).
AFW - August 20, 2012 - Report this comment
Thanks, Brock...and all, for v's and c's
Porfle Popnecker - August 21, 2012 - Report this comment
Awesome parody!
AFW - August 21, 2012 - Report this comment
Thanks, Porfle

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