Because a monsterrific ego comes with wealth and fame
Some superstar celebrities adopt a single name
There's Bono and there's Lassie and there's Sting and Prince and Cher
But then you've got Madonna, who grows names like armpit hair

She's -
Esther Madge Veronica Louise Ciccone Ritchie
Don't say just "Madonna" now or someone might get bitchy
Listen to her long enough, your underpants get itchy
Esther Vero Lou Madonna Penn Ciccone Ritchie

Umm Kabba-lahba-lahba humm Kabba-lite
Umm Kabba-lahba-lahba humm Kabba-lite

No singer-actress-dancer-author-stripper going gray
Should stay out of the news too long; you might get Swept Away
So reinvent your look, your sound, your bod, your faith, your name
And even write a children's book called "I Love Dick'n'Jane"

Ma-
donna Esther Ritchie Vero Penn Louise Ciccone
Not much Like a Virgin or a Prayer, yeah that's balo-nay
Don't forget her days of riding Dennis Rodman's po-nay
Esther Vero Penn Madonna Ritchie Lou Ciccone

[Music stops for key change, tempo increase, and
DEEP BREATH]

Ma-
donna Lou Veronica Ciccone, now just "Esther"
Used to grind in latex; now she knits in polyester
Still she knows the goal's to make you worship or detest 'er
Madge Louise Veronica Ciccone Ritchie -
ESTHER!