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Song Parodies -> "I Talk The Lines"

Original Song Title:

"I Walk The Line"

Original Performer:

Johnny Cash

Parody Song Title:

"I Talk The Lines"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

I pick up hot babes in a bar each night
I zero in on sweet chicks in my sight
I use my eyes and send out passion signs
Then, Talk The Lines,
I Talk The Lines..

Sometimes I say my wallet's in my other suit
They'll buy me booze and lend me cash to boot
Won't mess with those that I'd rate less than "Nines"
I stalk the "Fines"
And Talk The Lines..

Like, "Paired with Angelina, you're my choice.."
"If girls were cars, you'd be a new Rolls Royce.."
Their eyes light up and all resist declines,
They're clingin' vines
I Talk The Lines..

I'll say, "My right hand's under doctor's care.
Reach in this pocket, Corvette keys are there.."
There is no pocket, just a warm surprise to share
Conquest is mine,
I Talk The Lines..

Tell them, "My stock's in oil, please buy more gas.."
"Are you a teacher? have so much class!"
"One day we'll have to tour my diamond mines"..
Cornea shines,
I Talk The Lines..

I'll say, "I sure love fruit, that's quite a pear.."
"Bet you're a farm girl, with all that " 'Dairy Air'.."
"Let's go to my place, I don't own a chair.."
Get few declines,
I Talk The Lines..

"They ought to make you pay a beauty tax.."
"Mm, your perfume just made my nose climax.."
"At wax museums, bet you melt the wax"
Get few unkinds,
I Talk The Lines..

I'm never solitaire by that last call
Four footsteps up the stairs declares it all
Us, and the neighbors bang against the wall
Behind closed blinds..
Talk no more Lines..

Behind closed blinds..
Talk no more Lines..

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 12

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   12

User Comments

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alvin - October 17, 2007 - Report this comment
you sweet talked into giving you fives....many priceless 'lines' but i especially liked the "dairy air" one..and the bit about the
AFW - October 17, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanks, alvin
PMS - October 17, 2007 - Report this comment
Too many great lines to mention
27 views, 2 comments - October 17, 2007 - Report this comment
One of the funniest parodies of the year, with 27 views, but only 4 votes and 2 comments. If Spaff's name was on this, it would have 25 votes minimum. A crying shame the other 23 viewers didn't leave a vote or comment. I would do it for them if I could. Terrifically funny,
Guy - October 17, 2007 - Report this comment
This blows my mind - It's so sublime! Speaking of Spaff I'd say you out punned him with this one. I too liked the "Dairy Air" ROF laughable. Is it my imagination or did you actually add extra verses to this? That's a real plus when you can do that. Vote far right line, You're gettin' 5's.
AFW - October 17, 2007 - Report this comment
Thank you, PMS...............and thanks, 27-2..who-ever you are...appreciate vote and commentary.............and thanks to you, Guy...yes, I doubled the original...two complete choruses, so to speak...
Guy - October 17, 2007 - Report this comment
I did that with Helen Ready's "I Am Woman" called "I'm Religion". Sometimes we get on that roll and the OS just doesn't have enough material for our needs for the reads. Again - Excellent!
TJC - October 17, 2007 - Report this comment
Great stuff, AFW! Many funny 'lines'.
AFW - October 17, 2007 - Report this comment
And thanks to you, my good friend, TJC
Peregrin - June 21, 2008 - Report this comment
I found this by clicking on the 'random' button. Heh heh, many memorable lines - like alvin, the keys and pocket and surprise stanza caught my eye!
UnKnownVotrix - June 23, 2008 - Report this comment
What a cad you are, Sir !! . . . although I did enjoy the Corvette line !

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