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Song Parodies -> "Thick Mad Nad"
Original Song Title:
"Big Bad John"
(MP3)Original Performer:
Jimmy Dean
Parody Song Title:
"Thick Mad Nad"
Parody Written by:
Phil Alexander
The Lyrics
Hard to know where to start when describing Nadine Dorries, MP for Mid-Bedfordshire. As well as making (though getting away with) what can only be described as dishonest expenses claims, she has lied repeatedly about one of her consituents, calling him a stalker (and claiming she had got the police involved when she had not), on Any Questions recently she claimed that cannabis this year is 50 times the strength of last year's crop..
She has recently tried to add an amendment to a health bill to prevent two charities from giving abortion advice - including a (completely un-evidenced) claim that this would prevent 60,000 abortions. This is what was said about her during that debate:
“The hon. Lady has asserted many things to be facts that are not… Some of the things that she is saying are not borne out by the evidence.”- actually quoted from a 2008 debate, thus showing that at least she's consistent when it comes to bullshit.
...and it's as close as parliamentary language will let an MP come to saying "Liar, liar, pants on fire"
She has recently tried to add an amendment to a health bill to prevent two charities from giving abortion advice - including a (completely un-evidenced) claim that this would prevent 60,000 abortions. This is what was said about her during that debate:
“The hon. Lady has asserted many things to be facts that are not… Some of the things that she is saying are not borne out by the evidence.”- actually quoted from a 2008 debate, thus showing that at least she's consistent when it comes to bullshit.
...and it's as close as parliamentary language will let an MP come to saying "Liar, liar, pants on fire"
Every four-five years we get the choose
Who'll run the country and who will lose
One woman in Mid-Bedfordshire'll always get in
Yet I can't figure out how she could win: Mad Nad.
(Mad Nad, Mad Nad) Thick, Mad Nad (Mad Nad)
To say that she's deceitful is to understate
The way she attempts to manipulate
With made-up facts and emotional games
And even got off with her expenses claims, did Mad Nad:
Her "second home" (for which she got paid)
Was the place that she, her pets and children stayed
And only sometimes, on the odd weekends
Did she live in her "main" residence, Mad Nad
(Mad Nad, Mad Nad) Thick, Mad Nad (Mad Nad)
Now for some reason, she gets distressed
'Bout the advice from Marie Stopes, and BPAS
So she tried to amend the health care bill
Using made-up stats and then it went downhill for Mad Nad
Now, Dave may be an arrogant, sexist bloke
But I don't think he really meant to make that joke
That seemed to imply sexual frustration
But who stormed out in humiliation? Mad Nad
(Mad Nad, Mad Nad) Thick, Mad Nad (Mad Nad)
She lied 'bout a stalker, lied about pot
Intellectually honest? No, she's not
She'll make up facts 'n' figures on the hoof
Any site on the web will do as proof for Mad Nad
She seems to believe people are out to destroy her
If I were a shrink, I'd diagnose paranoia
Of her senses she must've taken leave
Could anybody really believe Mad Nad?
(Mad Nad, Mad Nad) Thick, Mad Nad (Mad Nad)
Now to finish off I'll summarize:
That Nadine Dorries MP tells lies
Dishonestly and hypocritically
Yet still she was re-elected MP, Mad Nad
(Mad Nad, Mad Nad) Thick, Mad Nad (Mad Nad)
Who'll run the country and who will lose
One woman in Mid-Bedfordshire'll always get in
Yet I can't figure out how she could win: Mad Nad.
(Mad Nad, Mad Nad) Thick, Mad Nad (Mad Nad)
To say that she's deceitful is to understate
The way she attempts to manipulate
With made-up facts and emotional games
And even got off with her expenses claims, did Mad Nad:
Her "second home" (for which she got paid)
Was the place that she, her pets and children stayed
And only sometimes, on the odd weekends
Did she live in her "main" residence, Mad Nad
(Mad Nad, Mad Nad) Thick, Mad Nad (Mad Nad)
Now for some reason, she gets distressed
'Bout the advice from Marie Stopes, and BPAS
So she tried to amend the health care bill
Using made-up stats and then it went downhill for Mad Nad
Now, Dave may be an arrogant, sexist bloke
But I don't think he really meant to make that joke
That seemed to imply sexual frustration
But who stormed out in humiliation? Mad Nad
(Mad Nad, Mad Nad) Thick, Mad Nad (Mad Nad)
She lied 'bout a stalker, lied about pot
Intellectually honest? No, she's not
She'll make up facts 'n' figures on the hoof
Any site on the web will do as proof for Mad Nad
She seems to believe people are out to destroy her
If I were a shrink, I'd diagnose paranoia
Of her senses she must've taken leave
Could anybody really believe Mad Nad?
(Mad Nad, Mad Nad) Thick, Mad Nad (Mad Nad)
Now to finish off I'll summarize:
That Nadine Dorries MP tells lies
Dishonestly and hypocritically
Yet still she was re-elected MP, Mad Nad
(Mad Nad, Mad Nad) Thick, Mad Nad (Mad Nad)
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