Ballad of Jerry Springer
©2004 Michael W. McVey

Jerry Springer is a host, his show's known from coast to coast,
He once was the mayor of Cincinnati.
Seems like only yesterday, when shock TV hit the waves,
Jerry decided to up the ante!

So here's to Jerry Springer, the king of lunacy,
My parents wouldn't let me watch him on TV.
They said there's too much cussing, women showing boobs,
They think it's worst show ever on the tube!
(Jer-ry! Jer-ry! Jer-ry!)

Every time he had a show, guests were at each other's throats,
The fights were always tough but Steve was tougher.
With the other bodyguards, he'd keep the guests apart.
I almost wish he were my brother!

So here's to Jerry Springer, the king of lunacy,
My parents wouldn't let me watch him on TV.
They said there's too much cussing, women showing boobs,
They think it's worst show ever on the tube!
(Jer-ry! Jer-ry! Jer-ry!)

Jerry Springer is still on, his show is going strong,
The FCC so far has failed to stop him.
Why they can't, I fail to see, the networks hear from Clear-TV,
But they've never been convinced to drop him.

And Steve's a real heartthrob, I wish I had his job,
Keeping fighting women separated.
I really do not know why guests come to his show,
Knowing they'll be humiliated!

So here's to Jerry Springer, the king of lunacy,
My parents wouldn't let me watch him on TV.
They said there's too much cussing, women showing boobs,
They think it's worst show ever on the tube!
(Jer-ry! Jer-ry! Jer-ry!)